Four things that happened to some anonymous guy online

Sometime things happen in your life that you remember many years later. And you wonder why. Here are four that happened to me:

  • The time I shared a meal with an African-American
  • The time I almost didn’t hire a guy who was different
  • The time I was a guest in the home of an Aboriginal family
  • The time I lived in Asia as a member of an Asian family

My African-American dinner guests

American’s might be puzzled by this one, but you don’t see a whole lot of African-Americans in an Australian city. As a consequence most Australians have a picture of African-Americans manufactured by media and the entertainment industry.

The husband worked for the USA consulate, and I think perhaps his wife did too. He had a benign sounding job title but the vibes he gave off had me imagining him chasing Jason Bourne. The two of them were probably the most articulate and polite people I have ever had at my dinner table.

My Iranian right-hand-man

In my first ever job (local government) I was tasked to create a work group of four to be managed by yours truly. I was in my early 20’s. One of the applicants stood out as somewhat unusual. He was Iranian, in his mid-40’s, and had a PhD. I wondered how I would manage and whether he would work in with the others in the team. I talked to my boss, and he encouraged me to give the guy a chance.

Fast forward many years. Farrokh was the best right-hand-man/colleague I have ever had the pleasure to work with. Initiative, creativity, reliability, productivity, patience … measured anyway you like.

Visiting indigenous folks

The first time I visited Cairns (North Queensland) I somehow got myself invited to have a coffee at the home of a local family. Again, and like many Australians, my only experience dealing with Aboriginals was avoiding substance-abusers at railway stations, or watching a succession of grifters on TV bad-mouthing (non-aboriginal) Australians whilst helping themselves to untold millions of taxpayer revenue.

The family I visited were nice. They were friendly and hospitable. Their home was just like most Australian homes I had visited. They were ordinary Australians.

Turning Asian

I lived for a time in an Asian country. Before that I had only had the briefest of visits to that part of the world. I learnt a lot there. About their culture and, subsequently, about ours. For example I learnt that concepts like ‘common sense’ and ‘good manners’ were not universal … they were specific to the country or region. So just because people didn’t act in accordance with the Aussie model of good manners, didn’t mean they were ill-mannered. It just meant that they were following their own version. Or sometimes they were ignoring both versions. Just like we do sometimes.

Conclusion

All four events at least somewhat surprised me at the time they happened. Why? No doubt someone out there will offer a theory.

As a consequence of these experiences, do I feel that:

  • all members of these various sub-sets of society are wonderful people?
  • that we should throw open the doors of Australia that everyone might settle here?
  • that I am guilty for something my ancestors did, or are alleged to have done to the group in question?

Not one bit. In fact, woke begone!

I do however better recognise that in the absence of first-hand experience, we do rely a lot on the media to form our opinions of others for us. And that the media often presents a distorted and incomplete image.

Acknowledging domestic violence in indigenous communities is racist. And so is failure to acknowledge it

This line has cropped up before but this latest incantation began with a discussion on the Australian TV show ‘Studio 10’. In this particular episode Ms Yumi Stynes declared a woman on the panel to be racist. Kindly refer to this article for some background.

Yumi has already had her recent share of progressive infamy – refer to her hosting role in an SBS show entitled ‘Is Australia sexist?

And then Aboriginal activist Elizabeth Wymarra had this to say online, “Just to clarify, Australian statistics show that Violence against Indigenous women and children is predominantly perpetrated by White Males, but again @Studio10au conveniently omit that statistic in order to demonise Indigenous Men” (Source)

See also:

The Senate Legal and Constitutional Affairs References Committee Report on Missing and murdered First Nations women and children (August 2024) Australia

Why is no one counting murdered Indigenous women and children? (15 August 2024) But again, nil mention of Indigenous men

Girl, 15, who attacked pregnant woman walking with pram jailed for a year (23 November 2022)

‘Racist’: coercive control laws could harm Indigenous women in Queensland, advocates warn (18 May 2021)

Australian media is failing to cover domestic violence in the right way (2 March 2021)

Assessing the risk of repeat intimate partner assault, by NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics & Research (December 2018)

FactCheck Q&A: Are Indigenous women 34-80 times more likely than average to experience violence? (4 July 2016)

Culture of denial (7 March 2007)

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(The graphic above was sourced here. You can google search on ‘domestic violence indigenous Australia’ – or similar – for further sources)