Regarding the notion of ‘ironic misandry’

August 2014 saw the publication of a number of articles discussing an unfortunate development in the gender debate that has been labelled ‘ironic misandry’.

Misandry is, of course, the irrational fear and loathing of men. These articles spawned the #MaleTears hashtag on Twitter, as well as the production and marketing of a range of products on the theme, such as coffee mugs and t-shirts.

The Rise of the Ironic Man Hater by Amanda Hess (8 August 2014)
Me and my #MaleTears: Facing the consequences of ironic hatred by Ally Fogg (10 August 2014)
Ironic Misandry: Why Feminists Pretending to Hate Men isn’t Funny by Sarah Begley (12 August 2014)
Hating men isn’t funny, says writer who doesn’t get good jokes by Dayna Evans (12 August 2014)
Your Guide to Understanding Ironic Misandry by Clementine Ford (26 August 2014)

pennyI loathe the concept of ironic misandry and see it as yet another symptom of an ideology that has gone seriously off the rails. Here’s why:

1. Ironic misandry is entirely at odds with the credo of ‘do unto others’

According to Wikipedia, “the Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a maxim, ethical code or morality that essentially states either of the following:

  • One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself
  • One should not treat others in ways that one would not like to be treated

This concept describes a reciprocal, or two-way, relationship between one’s self and others that involves both sides equally, and in a mutual fashion.

Many of us think of ‘do unto others’ as being a Christian credo, but the same or similar phrase is common to many religions and cultures across history. That’s no accident. ‘Do unto others’ is a noble and eminently sound ideal that would be understood and supported by most reasonable people.

Ironic misandry runs contrary to how I want to treat others or be treated myself. Ironic misandry does not represent how I want my friends and family to be treated, and I don’t think it’s how most women want their male friends or family members to be treated. And don’t even try to suggest that mocking men is different because … patriarchy.

And in terms of the community generally, how would most women would react were this concept to be turned back onto them in the form of ‘ironic misogyny’? But more on that later.

 2. Ironic misandry isn’t ironic

The definition of ‘irony’ is:

  • the expression of one’s meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.
  • a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often wryly amusing as a result.

But the indisputable fact is that real life feminists don’t believe or act in the opposite manner, i.e. treat men in a loving and respectful manner. Look at my posts on feminism, feminist anger, and feminist censorship for examples of what feminists say about men and how they treat them. Heck, just look at comments by Clementine Ford in her paper listed above, or Samantha Allen in this article.

Clementine Ford describes the “I bathe in male tears” logo and associated paraphernalia as “one glorious phrase and a handful of beautiful associated memes“. She goes on to state that “images such as the above pillory the buffoonery of the MRA movement while giving increasingly stressed out and undermined women a means of laughing at the enemy.”

valentiSo despite the fact that feminists are always telling us how they don’t hate men, Clementine has no qualms about referring to us as “the enemy“. (Oh I get it, just joking, right?)

Ironic misandry isn’t rocking the boat with regards to the status quo – it’s reinforcing it.

The proponents of ironic misandry consider it first and foremost a humorous invention. I beg to differ. As would, I would suggest, most mature adults concerned about social justice and the welfare of men and boys. In fact pretty much anyone with an ounce of empathy, a conscience, and a brain in their head. Either way, you can’t change sexist bigotry into something else just by claiming it is funny. As they say, “a monkey in silk is a monkey no less“.

Regardless of the selective blindness of feminists, many men and boys are suffering and their tears are very real. For example, we have just experienced the suicide of comic genius Robin Williams, at a time when the suicide rate for men is substantially greater than for women. Ditto for homelessness, etc.

3. Ironic misandry erodes mutual respect between the genders

Ironic misandry removes even further respect between the genders, when mutual respect is an essential ingredient in moving onwards and upwards with the gender debate. We need to be doing everything we can to build respect not eroding it further. Ironic misandry and other feminist devices like it will condemn us to many more years of lobbing grenades from trench to trench instead of working together to address a multitude of issues of shared concern.

Given that that the original ‘Slate’ article has been addressed by others, I’ll conclude this post with some comments in relation to the paper by Clementine Ford which I found to be particularly noisome:

MRAs will have you believe that misandry is:
a) rampant within the feminist community and
b) capable of causing equal if not greater harm to men than millennia of oppression and disadvantage could ever possibly do to women.

As I indicated earlier misandry IS rampant within the feminist community, as is feminist denial about that fact. I challenge you to assume a male identity and go online and try to post reasonable comments in debates regarding gender, and see how you are treated. How you are are routinely abused. How your posts are removed. How often you are banned, excluded, denied a voice.

Oh, and by the way Clementine, didn’t you/your editor close your article to comments so very quickly once the expected support failed to materialise? Let’s see what reader Jane was able to contribute before the shutters came down on your sideshow:

Baffled to why teenage girls don’t describe themselves as feminists? Re-read this article and imagine yourself as a teenage girl looking for relevance to her life. Instead of a reasoned argument, inspiration or anything that might be impacting her now or in the future, Clem “click-bait” Ford delivers a short rant on why it’s fun to ridicule certain people on the internet. Sure it might be a “release valve” to Ford who must have to deal with some crazy nutters on the internet but if this is the only article they read on feminism this week while asking, “Am I a feminist?” then I can understand why many, a few or even one young woman might reply, “If this is feminism, then no.”

Feminists just love to exaggerate the position of MRA with assertions like “MRA claim that men are more oppressed than women”, “MRA would have you believe that everything bad that happens to men is because of women”, and so on, and on. Can Clementine point us towards even one reference where MRA have stated that misandry can cause more harm than all the oppression and disadvantage ever experienced by women? Of course, she can’t – because no MRA ever made such a statement.

“Misogyny and misandry are treated by MRAs as interchangeable things, with the latter being widely viewed as ‘just as bad, if not worse’.” 

No, MRA treat these as two distinct things. The fact that some MRA might consider ‘misandry’ to be worse, is due only to the level of denial and hypocrisy within the feminist movement (regarding their inherent misandry), and the resultant chasm between how feminists demand to be treated and how they treat others.

“Feminism seeks to dismantle the patriarchy, thus liberating both women and men from its suffocating clutches.”

OK, Clementine, please provide some examples of feminism “liberating” men from anything.

“Humour is a vital tool for feminists lest we lose our marbles completely when dealing with the irrational and factually incorrect bleatings of people who, among other things, argue that sexual violence statistics have been made up by feminist run government agencies to oppress man’s sexual nature.”

Clementine, some examples please of statements made by MRA that are “factually incorrect”, or where MRA have claimed that sexual violence statistics were made up … “to oppress man’s sexual nature”. MRA have highlighted inaccuracies and distortions within statistics related to domestic violence, sexual assault, and other issues. I invite you to examine and comment upon the many examples that are provided in my blog posts on these topics. MRA raise these concerns only in the interest of enabling informed public debate based on a balanced and accurate portrayal of these important social issues.

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4. Gender reversal: What happens when a man attempts ironic misogyny?

In 2010 Paul Elam published an article entitled ‘October is the 5th annual Bash a Violent Bitch Month‘ in response to an earlier article in the feminist journal ‘Jezebel’. Although Paul has always asserted his article was satirical, years later it is still cited by feminists as proof of the alleged hideous misogyny of the men’s rights movement. A well-written discussion of Paul’s article can be found here.

In early 2016, Daryush ‘Roosh’ Valizadeh hit the headlines across the world when it was reported that he supported the legalisation of rape. This is what he actually wrote. Roosh’s article is explained further in ‘What Roosh’s satire exposed about modern-day socialism’.

Did feminists extend the same patience and understanding towards Paul’s or Roosh’s ironic offerings, to which they themselves felt entitled? Absolutely not, and in Roosh’s case both he and his supporters were subjected to a global campaign of harassment and threats of violence. Yes, the very same behaviour that feminists angrily assert that men oppress women with. Anyway read both this article and this one, and you can form your own view.

Moving forward to June 2016, and Australian TV personality Eddie McGuire chose to offer up a little of his own brand of irony. Team feminism went ballistic. And on and on they went:

I refuse to date men who like footy, by Koraly Dimitriadis (13 July 2016)
Time to call BS on the ‘just jokes’ defence, by Chris Bath (28 June 2016)
There can be a fine line between humour and menace in blokes banter, by David Penberthy (26 June 2016) Male self-loathing tosh (**Then read a good rebuttal by Mark Dent here**)
This is what happens when you call out sexism in Australia (25 June 2016)
Police: Don’t take McGuire’s comments lightly (23 June 2016)

And finally,  Miranda Devine’s sensible comments on the matter here

See also:

The evidence is mounting – a man’s place is in the home (4 November 2017) I don’t see the humour here but the author, Hadley Freeman, claims it’s satire:

Hadley’s article was very similar to this 27 October 2017 article in Slate.com

In this article Irish feminists reject the notion of misandry (October 2017)

“It is impossible to have an “ingrained prejudice” against men when we live in a world made by men for men. In a patriarchal society, the idea of men who are oppressed by virtue of their gender could never be anything but a joke.

Clementine Ford: This is the personal price I pay for speaking out online (13 July 2017) Such a martyr to the cause of misandry. And “a message that was quite clearly withering satire” Oh yes. Clearly. Because vagina.

Men shouldn’t get offended by people saying that “men are trash”  (12 July 2017) Reddit discussion thread

Michelle Carter found guilty by judge in text message suicide case (16 June 2017) USA

Why you should think twice before laughing at that rape joke online (8 June 2017) Clementine Ford rails against “dark humour” – now that’s ironic

I am so sick of people acting like “misandry” is equivalent to misogyny (1 June 2017) These feminists won’t even concede that misandry is a thing.

Forget your PC nonsense, this hormone needs to be banned from workplaces (29 May 2017)

Bad Girls Advice members call for the group to be shut down after posts made fun of terror attack (24 May 2017) In this case, not so much ‘ironic misandry’ as ‘ironic misanthropy’

‘Anti-feminism’ posters at American University investigated as a ‘hate crime’ (10 March 2017)

The one question I’d like to ask those who defend Wicked Campers’ vile ‘humour’ by Clementine Ford (19 February 2017)

Woman urges people to ‘murder all male babies’ (24 January 2017)

Women kicking balls, I’d like to see that (22 January 2017) New Australian women’s football ad campaign

Hwages: Music clip sparks debate, celebration in Saudi Arabia (5 January 2017)

#KillAllMen: A feminist play at Australia’s National Institute Dramatic Art (October 2016) as discussed in this blog post

“Eight women create an internet utopia where they discuss the most intimate details of their lives, the most righteous, and the most hilarious. Dating, camming, work, love, and how to be an out and proud feminist. But when one of them disappears after being attacked everything changes. #KillAllMen suddenly moves from joke to reality.”

Feminists treat men badly. It’s bad for feminism, by Cathy Young (30 June 2016)

Now this IS ironic (25 May 2016) USA

Oscar-winning actress Emma Thompson’s diversity solution: ‘Kill’ all the old white men (13 February 2016) UK

Men: Here are ten perfect holiday gifts for the feminist in your life (21 December 2015) So a Masters in Gender Studies qualifies someone to write articles like this … impressive

The Year in Male Tears (21 December 2015) and related reddit discussion thread

Some people sadly missed the point about #MasculinitySoFragile (24 September 2015) with related reddit discussion thread here

Hateful Guardian writer Julie Bindel proposes Feminazi concentration camps for all men (5 September 2015) Further good paper on this issue here (The Other McCain)

Ironic Misandry Claims Its First Victim, by Amanda Hess (22 May 2015) and here is other side of this story

The irony of ironic misandry (13 May 2015)

‘Rape prevention tips’ go viral. Upset men (23 March 2015)

29 Perfect Accessories For All Women Who Don’t Give A F*ck (22 March 2015)

And of course it’s definitely NOT funny should some men attempt to start their own campaign with a similarly whimsical theme (16 March 2015)

Feminists are bad comedians (15 March 2015)

http://www.reddit.com/r/TumblrInAction/comments/2d0wax/tw_not_tumblr_men_that_dont_laugh_at_ironic/ (the disscussion thread from which the discussion thread extract shown above was sourced)

No, we don’t literally want to ban men. But 2014 was the year women got even (16 December 2014)

Samantha Allen explains why she hates men (7 November 2014) An example of not-so-ironic misandry

Deprogramming women’s hatred of men (10 September 2014)

The ironical irony of ironic misandry (4 September 2014)

Clementine cashes in (12 September 2013)

Clementine Ford on “those accusations” and what motivates her activism (22 August 2014)

Clementine Ford calling fellow feminists stupid (8 May 2012)

More bleating from Clementine Ford by Greg Canning (3 June 2012)

Down under news roundup by Greg Canning (14 September 2013) Refer para.6

The Misandry Choir by Andy Bob (31 December 2012)

misandry

godot

Regarding gender reversal and sexist double-standards

The Men’s Rights forum on reddit.com makes for great reading if you want to get a quick handle on gender issues from a non-feminist perspective. The forum often features discussion threads that exemplify the frequently outrageous double-standards disseminated by the feminist movement and mainstream media alike.

Here’s a selection of alternative scenarios wherein which one might do well to flip genders and re-assess the situation …

BBC berates male domestic violence victim for speaking out – names sexist bursary scheme in honour of his abuser (28 November 2017)

Racy ad campaign featuring naked men called out for being ‘sexist’ (15 October 2017)

New Data Reveals Fat Women Don’t Like Fat Men And They Demand You Be OK With It (9 October 2017)

5 Proven Reasons There’s Merit In Sticking It To Your Ex (11 August 2017)

Rape juries to hear more about men’s sexual history to increase chance of conviction (8 August 2017)

Jack Wilson’s budgie smugglers almost eclipsed the Ninja Warrior finale (26 July 2017)

Cristiano Ronaldo in underwear goes viral faster: #RonaldoFaster Commercial (11 July 2017) Imagine if this was a female athlete?

New low for UK national newspaper ‘The Independent’, as headline explains away a BBC paedophile abusing a CHILD as her “performing a sex act on a young MAN because it was EMPOWERING to her”. Feminist bias and hypocrisy over abuse reporting is worst I’ve ever seen (3 June 2017) Reddit discussion thread here.

‘Body shaming’ Playboy model Dani Mathers says her privacy was invaded along with her victim’s (1 June 2017) Now reverse the genders. Imagine the howls if a male perpetrator got slap on the wrist punishment and then complained about the invasion of his privacy!

Barbara Kay: No consequences for women who “stealth” men (12 May 2017)

Can you imagine the furore if genders were switched with this news.com.au story about female sex-tourists enjoying the skills of male Balinese prostitutes?

Facebook investigating Bad Girls Advice following claims its breaches Community Standards (27 April 2017)

It’s OK to fat-shame as long as the target is male (10 March 2017) UK

Basketball team blasted for ‘sexist’ poster showing close up of woman’s exposed breasts (7 March 2017)

“The club also released a picture of a topless male model, complete with sixpack, for the big match — but it was the women’s poster which did not escape the wrath of social media.” Because … and despite …

Emma Watson on Vanity Fair cover: ‘Feminism is about giving women choice’ (6 March 2017)

The following is “Proudly supported by the Australian Government” through “The Australian Council for the Arts” (21 February 2017) Reddit discussion thread and linked resources. Can you imagine the uproar if this was written about white women? How quickly the relevant gov’t agency would distance themselves from the author?

All-male singing group subject to protests whilst all-female singing group at same Uni, not so much (14 February 2017)

‘Elephant donger’: I’m A Celeb girl talk turns filthy over Kris Smith (31 January 2017) Care for some casual objectification of men?

Women kicking balls? I’d like to see that (22 January 2017) a new TV ad campaign to support women’s sport. Good goal, poorly executed … let’s continue making light of female violence. And in terms of gender-reversal … ‘Men grabbing pussy? I’d like to see that‘ saw unending scorn being poured forth upon Donald Trump … and switching genders doesn’t make it suddenly funny.

Comment about female sports reporters in male changing rooms (21 December 2016)

Nova 100 radio & Chrissie Swan celebrates the severing of a man’s penis (26 November 2016)

Wilderness School girls under fire for ‘hook-up wall’ of boys, who claim a double standard of sexual objectification (11 November 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here.

The Acceptable Bigotry of Michelle Obama (October 2016)

Perth man says he won’t date women who are ‘over 30 and overweight’ (5 October 2016) Article neglects to mention that women cut off men as abruptly as this (due to some perceived deficiency re: money/career/height/car/etc) every  single day. The difference is man complains about getting rebuffed = loser/creep, whereas woman complains about getting rebuffed = victim/hero. Related Reddit discussion thread here.

Domestic violence double standards – male MP was forced to stand down when cautioned for assaulting partner yet Sarah Champion receives support for same crime (26 September 2016) UK. More on that issue here and here.

I’m tired of being ashamed of my micro-penis‘ (25 September 2016) And no, I don’t anticipate a companion piece about a woman with an extremely loose vagina because it’s only OK to objectify/demean men with click-bait rubbish like this.

10 years jail versus no jail: Guess which sex-offender was female?

There’s nothing shameful about this body (9 September 2016) Goodlooking guys have no right to feel objectified (only women can do that)

Feminist MP who sought suspension of Philip Davies for “sexism” attended gender segregated rally & was elected via all-women shortlist (16 August 2016)

Journalists have used the 2016 Olympics in Rio as as opportunity to yet again demonstrate how objectification of men is OK, whilst simultaneously ranting about alleged objectification of female athletes:

Apparently NBC allows its female hosts to fondle topless athletes on live TV (8 August 2016) Again, anyone remember the Chris Gayle incident in Australia? I’m surprised this incident didn’t make it into Cosmopolitan‘s ‘Most Sexist Moments of the 2016 Olympics‘. No, I’m not, because you can’t be sexist towards men, right?

36 of the Greatest Summer Olympic Bulges (3 August 2016) Cosmopolitan provides this classic display of sexist double-standards, after previously publishing an article entitled ‘Confirmed: Why men who objectify women are effing horrible‘. In a subsequent article the author makes a weak attempt at justifying publication of the earlier article. And here’s Cosmo at it again a couple of weeks later.

Reader’s comment: “It’s all very simple. Admiring female beauty is wrong. Admiring male physiques is right. When you replace ‘objectification’ with ‘admire’, you illustrate how moronic the concept is. I have asked feminists the difference between objectification and admiration, and the answer is some purported subtle difference in attitude in the mind of the beholder. Rather conveniently, only a feminist can tease this difference out, like a French pig sniffing for truffles.” (Source).

This feminist takes the classic perspective that it’s different for women to objectify men because women don’t abuse or assault men, etc. See related Reddit discussion thread here.

Another magazine, The Berry, followed Cosmo’s lead. See related Reddit discussion here. Oh, and here comes pro-feminist news.com.au’s equally tasteless and hypocritical contribution entitled ‘We need to talk about the men’s rowing uniform’

Man denies his penis ended his Olympics dream (18 August 2016) Oh look, another Olympics male objectification story. But the author informs us that it’s all in jest, so it’s OK

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Body shaming is horrible, unless it’s against men (21 August 2016)

Personal trainer claims he was dropped from Loose Women for ‘refusing to take my top off’ (18 July 2016) UK with related Reddit discussion thread here

Lesbian MMA fighter celebrates championship win by kissing announcer (10 May 2016) Anyone remember the Chris Gayle incident?

Spurned lover daubs graffiti over ‘cheating’ partner’s Range Rover (5 May 2016) Can you imagine these comments being printed if the “spurned lover” was male?

“Bemused onlookers praised the scorned woman’s courage as the alleged love rat jumped in his car and sped off. Stylist Connie Nakala, 28, said: “She’s brilliant. An inspiration to all women everywhere!” While Associate Nitin Sharma, 30, said: “She was very brave to do it. And good for her.””

Hulk Hogan called a ‘wuss’ by hypocritical American talk show host (23 March 2016)

Madonna strips girl to reveal her breast part. Where are the feminists? (19 March 2016) Australia

Boy and girl, both 16, have consensual sex–only the boy faces statutory rape charges (17 March 2016) Ireland

Kentucky court rules in underage sex case involving teens (17 March 2016) USA

Why do so few men turn up to hear women speak? by Ruby Hamad (10 March 2016) Australia with related Reddit discussion thread here. No reciprocal responsibility for feminists to attend MRA events. My blog post on this issue is here.

It’s OK to objectify men on The Morning Show (2 February 2016) Australia

WATCH: ‘Can you take your shirt off?’ Dakota Johnson and Leslie Mann hit on reporter (2 February 2016) This incident was also covered in this article by Martin Daubney

Win a date with Doctor Mike! (18 January 2016) Hands up who doesn’t think we will see ‘Win a date with Doctor Vanessa!’ anytime soon?

In this incident a female sports presenter made disparaging on-air comments about the appearance of a football player, but when he responded like-for-like then HE was the one subject to public criticism (14 January 2016)

“They’ll shame young men who move away from marriage but when a woman does it she’s being independent” (6 November 2015) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

Women are allowed to objectify men because (8 September 2015) and related reddit discussion thread

Hey, that’s *our* trick!, by Dalrock (1 May 2015)

Royal tragic kisses Harry and proposes – for third time (7 May 2015) Stalker commits (sexual?) assault but it’s said to be “cheeky” and a source of humour – after all the perp is only a girl. In this article the commission of this crime is said to “delight” the crowd.

‘Australia’s hottest men’ on the Sunrise TV show (31 March 2015) Video

What would happen if a female TV host was discussed by male journalists in this manner? (31 March 2015)

20 Feminist Headlines That Would Count As Hate Speech If They Were Written About Jews, by Janet Bloomfield (24 March 2015)

When ladies rule (22 November 2014)

double_standards

A men-only UN conference on gender equality? If only it was a joke (7 October 2014)

Female rapist pursues statutory rape victim for child support (2 September 2014)

Is it acceptable for the BBC to say this about men? (3 September 2014)

Eight benefits of dating a younger man (27 August 2014) Read this article carefully and then imagine the sexes were reversed. Would the article have been published? What would the public reaction have been?

Why we objectify men without guilt (21 August 2014)

Why Britain’s women are allowed to sexually objectify men (19 October 2014)

Full frontal Disney: Feminism’s Nudity Double Standard (19 August 2014)

Thought experiment: Let’s reverse the sexes in this story about drunk shaming (2 August 2014)

Video contrasts negative consequences of domestic violence for Chris Brown with the success of husband beater Mary J. Bilge. Feminists downvote it to oblivion (2013) Reddit discussion thread with linked video

http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/25co9f/another_rant_about_coworkers_and_manning_up/

http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/25cm81/the_other_woman_three_men_gang_up_to_take_vicious/

http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/25cr74/americas_first_lady_would_do_well_to_remember/

http://www.hireahubby.com.au/residential-services/about-hire-a-hubby.php Can you imagine the public reaction to someone starting a business called “Hire a wife”?

Alex from Target gets objectified, but it’s ok because Alex is a boy (November 2014) Related reddit discussion thread here and a follow-up article here

Halle attacks Gabriel as a deadbeat who is using child support to avoid having to work. She says, “There is no case, no law, no logic that says a healthy, active man gets to simply live off child support that the wealthier mother earns.”‘ (3 November 2014) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

Sexist double standards? They’re mostly against men via @RationalMale (4 September 2014)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E07ulYo_H2s

“If a fraternity posted a sign that branded certain women “sluts,” does anyone seriously think the fraternity would not be punished for that? That the school’s president wouldn’t condemn it and call for an investigation and hearings? That Bwog and like-minded progressive outlets wouldn’t have a conniption? But it’s okay to distribute flyers calling certain men rapists. (And which is worse, being called a “slut” or a “rapist”?)

Only in the loopy world of academia and progressive media outlets would such a double standard be deemed acceptable.” A comment by Pierce Harlan at http://www.avoiceformalestudents.com/vigilante-rape-hysteria-at-columbia-university/

Read how this author, Barbara Ellen, rationalises that having sex with underage students is OK if the student is a teenage boy – This shameful liaison does not deserve prison (29 November 2009). Then in a later article Barbara goes on to explain that intimate partner violence is not so bad if the person doing the hitting is female – Solange and Jay-Z: It’s simply not the same if a man is hit by a woman (18 May 2014). Thankfully, there then followed two sound rebuttals by Ally Fogg and Jonathan Taylor. And a March 2015 McCain article on the issue.

This is progress, I think? Huffpo uses the term “rape” for a female teacher and a male minor. Note that two other news sources didn’t use the R-word (6 November 2014) Reddit mensrights discussion thread and linked article

Here is another article on the Jay Z Solange incident – Another side of the double standard (20 May 2014)

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See also:

34 Men Discuss Society’s Insane Double Standards That Favor Women And Hurt Men, by Lorenzo Jensen III (7 February 2017)

A Long Island Bar’s Age Policy Differs for Men and Women. Is It Legal? (10 August 2016) USA

The Confused Male: Do women really want what they say they want? (3 May 2016) UK

This is the moment Sunrise’s Nuala Hafner asked a ‘muscly man’ on a beach if he was single live on national TV – a year before Chris Gayle sleazed onto Mel McLaughlin. So what’s the difference? (6 January 2016)

Upset By Gayle’s Lechery? Remember Sharapova Flirting With This Journalist? (5 January 2016)

Nikkole Paulun and How the Media Brain Washes Men into Serving Deadbeat Moms (6 January 2016) USA

Chivalry but equality: The feminist double-standard, by Prentice Reid (21 April 2015)

No-Questions-Asked Safe Haven Baby Abandonment Law now in all 50 US States /w No Financial nor Legal Penalty For Women Only. Men Still Shackled With Debilitating Child Support Obligations. No Safe Haven Child Abandonment Exists For Men (22 March 2015) Reddit mensrights discussion thread and linked article

Two Teens Have Sex. Neither Could Legally Consent, But Only the Boy Gets a Felony Charge (10 March 2015)

Australian breakfast TV show ‘Sunrise’ covers the ‘cougar’ phenomenon (26 February 2015) Older men+younger women is creepy and exploitative, but older women+younger guys is funny/harmless or even empowering. You know, a case of ‘go girl’.

The Feminist View from a comfortable armchair (20 February 2015)

Five male university students accused of sexual assault are suing the school — and you will enjoy the school’s response  (6 February 2015)

What statements/generalizations about men are you tired of hearing from women? (6 February 2015) A reddit mensrights discussion thread

http://do-feminists-kno.tumblr.com/ Contains several examples of feminist hypocrisy and double-standards

[Study] Men who treat women the same as they treat other men, without benevolent sexism/female privilege, are seen as overwhelmingly sexist by both men and women (15 January 2015) Academic thesis and associated Reddit mensrights discussion thread

Observations from my time in menswear (6 November 2014) Reddit mensrights discussion thread

‘Good Men Project’ article about how men should accept abusive girlfriends (25 August 2014)

The ‘Fappening’ and Media Hypocrisy (3 September 2014) This video concerns the hacking & leaking of nude celebrity pics

Judge asks, Why are only boys charged with underage sex? (29 May 2014)

Double standards – Feminism’s sorry record on the subject of rape (31 March 2014)

Down boy! On training your man like a puppy (1 August 2014) This one would go down like a bomb if a man wrote it about woman, but because it’s about men it’s (meant to be) funny. Yeah right

DV_doublestandard

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doublestandards

not as sexistobjectify

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Domestic violence is not a gendered issue – Why the pervasive sexist bias against men?

Domestic violence (DV), also referred to as Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) or Family & Domestic Violence (FDV), is a shocking blight on the community. This is a scourge that inflicts substantial negative impacts on the lives of countless men, women and children. Whilst definitions have evolved and broadened, DV is loosely defined as “physical, sexual, or psychological harm by a current or former partner or spouse“.

It is important to acknowledge that DV encompasses man on man, women on women, man on woman, and woman on man violence (both cis- and transgender). Further, in many instances violence is perpetrated by both partners as shown in the accompanying diagram. There is also a strong nexus between the incidence of child abuse/neglect and subsequent perpetration of domestic violence by affected individuals upon reaching adulthood.

IPV-Truthwgray

The Wikipedia entry for ‘Epidemiology of domestic violence‘ provides readers with useful background information on this topic. For those willing to read something a little meatier, I would recommend this paper by esteemed DV researcher Malcolm George. Malcolm walks the reader through the historical context to the current debate about gender differences in violent behaviour and the way that society responds to the issue.

Many of those working within the DV sector, particularly here in Australia, only choose to acknowledge one element of the problem – that part involving male perpetrators and female victims. It is no coincidence that most staff within these government agencies, universities and NGO’s are strongly influenced by, and biased towards, feminist ideology. The feminist position is unequivocal, and it is that domestic violence = men’s violence towards women. Here is an example of that mindset, and here are many others.

This routine failure by feminists to recognise and discuss male victims, female perpetrators and bi-directional violence is no accident or coincidence. It is a deliberate strategy to build their brand, and in so doing demonise the overwhelming majority of men who have never, and would never, hurt or abuse their partner.

As a result, and in order to support the feminist narrative, a great deal of ‘cherry-picking’ and misrepresentation occurs in relation to the statistics provided in DV literature. In addition, the design and implementation of survey instruments is too often tainted with bias. This issue, that of feminist efforts to hide or discredit legitimate research and/or generate false or misleading statistics, is explored in this further blog post.

You will note, as you scroll down this page, that there are a multitude of sources of DV statistics, particularly the United Kingdom and the United States. Here in Australia, much less research has been undertaken – particularly in relation to male victimisation. One of the more significant sources is the Australian Bureau of Statistics Personal Safety Survey 2012, which found that one in three victims of domestic abuse were male. The results of overseas studies generally found levels of male and female victimisation that were closer to parity, and in some instances even higher rates of victimisation for men that women.

Unfortunately many journalists display remarkable tunnel-vision when addressing the topic of IPV. Indeed some have suggested that the media is complicit in the same sort of systemic gender bias against males noted earlier amongst those working in the field of DV.

Turning to my first example, an article called ‘Til death do us part’ which appeared in The Australian newspaper. It consisted of five pages of heart-wrenching coverage of men’s violence towards female partners, but made no mention of any other form of domestic violence, i.e. m-m, f-f, or women on men. Similarly this February 2014 article from The Mail newspaper also neglected to mention that men can be victims too.

Fiona McCormack also ignores male victims and female abusers this item on Australian ABC TV … except in an aside where she implies that anyone who raises the issue of women abusers is only seeking to “excuse” the behaviour of male abusers. This is very much akin to the feminist predilection of labelling anyone who questions various aspects of sexual assault (e.g. false rape allegations) as being “rape apologists” “victim blamers” etc.

Now let’s turn to this article by Charlie Pickering (more about Charlie here). Charlie is concerned that more attention is paid to the issue of random one-punch attacks on men, than on the violence visited nightly on women people in their homes. He goes on to state:

“For a long time, the term domestic violence has softened and normalised what is really going on. A more accurate term is ‘men’s violence against women’. Not ‘violence against women’, because that takes the responsibility for it away from those who need to be made responsible.”

This belief, that by acknowledging male victims and female perpetrators, we are somehow ignoring the validity and the pain of female victims is absurd, yet unfortunately commonplace in public discourse. The fact that there may be somewhat fewer male victims does not, nor should not, make domestic violence a gendered issue.

A precious few writers, like this one, suggest a more practical and unbiased approach to the issue:

“When it comes to the statistics about domestic abuse, it doesn’t matter to me how many men to how many women experience domestic violence. Domestic violence is a power issue more than a gender issue. Intimate Partner Violence affects men and women, and I really do not care in what proportion …

Within anti-domestic violence advocacy, there seems to be a trend to pit female victims against male victims and vice-versa. I do not know who is behind it, nor do I know if there is a “who” to blame. I do know that blame has no place in this fight against domestic abuse, especially when victim blames victim for any reason …

In a perfect society, men and women are equally protected under the law not because more laws were made to protect one sex but because in each mind and heart of all people, women and men are respected equally, and the individual contributions or crimes are our only measures of judgment. However, this ideal is as far away from our current reality as the idea that no person would seek power over another.”

Many others within the wider community have, however, embraced a biased and incomplete representation of DV, liberally salted with misinformation, at face value. Who could blame them, given that so many sources are bellowing out the same relentless message about male perpetrators and female victims, whilst studiously ignoring other elements of the issue.

Here in Australia, let’s look at this page within the web site of the Department of Social Services entitled ‘Women’s safety’, and the linked 28 page literature review prepared by ‘Urbis’ consultants at a cost of $220,000. One would have assumed, especially given the enormous cost, that the review would have encompassed all forms of abuse and perpetration. But, unfortunately, it did not.

In fact the review states that “Male perpetrators of domestic violence or sexual assault against men and female perpetrators of either offence against men have not been considered in this literature review. It is acknowledged that in practice the great majority of programs will be targeted towards men who commit domestic violence or sexual assault against women.”

Yes, that makes perfect sense … there are no programs for female offenders so let’s pretend they don’t exist. Such circular logic is (almost) unbelievable. And no, there is no corresponding ‘Mens Safety’ page within the DSS web site.

To be fair, the authors of some studies do admit that there are many female perpetrators and male victims, and that little research has been directed towards these groups. They also admit that there are probably many similarities between male and female perpetrators of IPV. They then invariably proceed, however, to offer a variety of justifications to continue their focus on the ‘domestic violence = Mens violence towards women’ model (example).

When misleading statistics are repeatedly exposed the feminist reaction is to move the goalposts by expanding the reach of the definition of domestic violence to encompass sexual violence, and less tangible forms of non-physical ‘violence’. This serves to both maximise the perceived magnitude of the problem, as well as support the anti-male narrative.

Naturally those areas where female perpetration is substantial, such as child abuse and elder abuse, are totally ‘out of bounds’. This theme is explored in this separate blog post. The same approach has been taken by feminists to prop up the notion of the existence of a ‘rape culture‘ in western societies.

Those of us concerned about men’s rights seek to have all aspects of domestic violence considered, as well as seeking remedies to specific issues such as:

  • the lack of resources to assist abused men and their children
  • laws and legal procedures that are based on the assumption that the male in the relationship is the abuser
  • negative and biased behaviour towards men who seek assistance, for example the screening of (only) male callers to abuse help-lines to determine if they are in fact perpetrators (example)

A selection of statistical sources that haven’t been doctored to support the feminist narrative

Dunedin study gender violence truths (13 June 2016) Video

References examining assaults by women on their spouses or male partners: An Annotated Bibliography by Martin S. Fiebert. This bibliography examines 286 scholarly investigations: 221 empirical studies and 65 reviews and/or analyses, which demonstrate that women are as physically aggressive, or more aggressive, than men in their relationships with their spouses or male partners. Here is a link to an updated June 2013 version of Fiebert’s bibliography.

Partner Abuse, Volume 1, No. 1, 2010 The first edition of a new journal created to showcase academic research into domestic violence without gender bias

Partner Abuse State of Knowledge Project – Facts and Statistics on Domestic Violence at-a-Glance. Sponsored by the Journal Partner Abuse, November, 2012. This study is also discussed in this article
Male Victims of Intimate Partner Violence in the United States: An Examination of the Review of Literature through the Critical Theoretical Perspective, by Caroletta A. Shuler (2010) and related reddit discussion thread

Extensive listing of mainly North American research findings related to domestic violence (29 April 2015)

Family violence in Canada: A statistical profile (27 January 2011) Almost equal numbers of male and female victims of DV

Symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder in Men who Sustain Intimate Partner Violence: A Study of Help-seeking and Community Samples (2012)

Partner Violence as Female-specific in Aetiology

Intimate partner violence: Facts and statistics (1 September 2014) Included some discussion of ‘Patriarchal Dominance’ theory

Domestic violence rates are higher for homosexual couples than for heterosexual couples (18 November 2013)

Preliminary Examination of a Mutual Intimate Partner Violence Intervention Among Treatment-Mandated Couples (2013)

Male victims of domestic violence: A Substantive and Methodological Research Review by Michael S. Kimmel (2001)

Women who perpetrate intimate partner violence: A review of the literature with recommendations for treatment (January 2007)

Disabusing the definition of domestic violence: How women batter men and the role of the Feminist State by Linda Kelly 2003

Unprecedented domestic violence study affirms need to recognise male victims (21 May 2013)

One-third of domestic violence victims in active-duty families are men (27 August 2014)

Partner Violence Against Men in England & Wales and the Gender Bias of Public Bodies (2014)

Aggression in British Heterosexual Relationships: A Descriptive Analysis

The Truth About Domestic Violence – You’ll Never Believe… (a must-see video on Youtube)

Research into domestic violence-related deaths (USA/2010) More for men than women

Newer perspectives on domestic violence (April 2010)

http://freethoughtblogs.com/hetpat/2014/06/11/can-we-finally-nail-down-those-male-victim-statistics/ (United Kingdom)

See recent Swedish DV research here

Differences in Frequency of Violence and Reported Injury Between Relationships With Reciprocal and Nonreciprocal Intimate Partner Violence (2006)

“Almost 24% of all relationships had some violence, and half (49.7%) of those were reciprocally violent. In non-reciprocally violent relationships, women were the perpetrators in more than 70% of the cases.”

A summary of credible research about domestic violence

This video features an incredibly fast rundown of published domestic violence research that runs contrary to the feminist position (15 June 2016)

http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/28smbv/gender_symmetry_in_domestic_violence_and_why_it/

http://scholar.google.com/scholar?hl=en&q=gender+symmetry&btnG=&as_sdt=1%2C5&as_sdtp=

http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/c3lvm/faq_studies_showing_high_frequency_of_women/

A 2009 source but which still contains some useful information and references

Some Australian statistics/background info

ABS Personal Safety survey results 2016

Senior public servants demonstrating their unswerving support for the feminist narrative regarding FDV (12 April 2017) Video

Western Australia: half of reported domestic violence harm caused by 2% of offenders (15 December 2016)

ABS violent crime statistics released July 2016

Behavioural change program for men at risk of committing domestic violence launched in ACT (14 June 2016) Violent/abusive women are completely left out of this program – an outrageous demonstration of gender bias (lodge a complaint here). More on crazy developments in the ACT at ‘Domestic violence levy: Canberra sets an absurd precedent‘ (18 June 2016)

Is a national approach needed to address domestic violence in Australia? (1 April 2016) Provides brief overview of what’s happening in each state

ABC Fact File: Domestic Violence in Australia (6 April 2016)

More than 125,000 women homeless because of domestic violence (15 February 2016). The only figures for male victimisation that were mentioned – because they appeared to support the feminist perspective – were drawn from this media release from a government agency. What’s not mentioned though is that the relatively low numbers of men seeking assistance are indicative of factors other than simply lower rates of male victimisation, incl.:

  • the rampant genderbias of ‘help-lines’, advocacy groups and even government agencies
  • the (widely-known) lack of resources available to help male victims (with or without children, and
  •  the much greater incidence of non-reporting of DV by men (compared to women)

FactCheck Q&A: is domestic violence in Australia on the decline? (3 February 2016) Also includes 75+ readers comments

Australian DV statistics fact-sheet produced by the organisation ‘One in Three’

Domestic Violence in Australia: Are women and men equally violent?

Domestic Violence, by Chris Lloyd (21 January 2015) Very thorough, especially in relation to Victorian DV statistics

Anglicare WA survey summary with further details available from Anglicare WA’s web site (2014)

2014 article that discusses teen dating abuse and found roughly equal number of male and female abusers.

Boys Victims of Dating Violence, Too (29 January 2016) USA

This paper by the Australian Domestic and Family Violence Clearinghouse is also worth reading, although I disagree with aspects of it. It is entitled ‘The Gender Debate in Domestic Violence: The Role of Data‘ (May 2013)

An April 2014 discussion about domestic violence and its relationship to urban planning practice.

http://mensrightsmelbourne.com/2014/03/26/domestic-violence-by-women-over-the-past-eight-years-rocketed-by-159/

Intimate Partner Abuse of Men, by Tilbrook, E.,  Allan, A., and Dear, G. (2010)

Articles on IPV sourced from the ‘A Voice for Men’ web site (various authors)

The irrefutable proof is in: DV is not gendered (except when it is, which is most of the time) by David King (2 August 2016) Australia. Recommended reading

Steven Pinker: sex, violence, and failure of enlightenment (11 September 2015)

This article and related reddit discussion concern a move in Victoria, Australia, to alter the law in relation of using self-defence where death of a partner occurs (article) (discussion)

NCFM Vice President responds to criticism about MRA’s and the AVfM conference in Detroit (25 July 2014)

Recruiting domestic violence spies by Jim Muldoon (18 July 2014)

http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/domestic-violence-industry/the-cycle-of-the-female-abuser/ (15 July 2014)

http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/the-state-of-play-for-men-domestic-violence/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/feminism/feminist-lies-feminism/the-feminists-great-equality-lie/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/domestic-violence-industry/australian-domestic-violence-hysteria/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/men/mens-health/callout-to-australian-british-and-canadian-men-for-help/

On male victims of domestic violence by M. R. Walks (17 February 2012)

http://www.avoiceformen.com/allnews/flawed-domestic-violence-survey-challenged-by-mens-health-advocates/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/domestic-violence-industry/when-a-girl-hits-you/

http://whatmenthinkofwomen.blogspot.com.au/2010/10/dv-debate-paul-elam-against-feminist.html

General articles on Intimate Partner Violence drawn from other sources

How Victoria’s family violence system fails some victims – by assuming they’re perpetrators (14 November 2017) I thought this paper was going to talk about men being misidentified as DV aggressors, but oh no, apparently it happens to women all the time <facepalm> and men exploit this to obtain intervention orders to protect themselves (& their children) from women who aren’t really hitting/abusing them.

Studies Show Lesbians Much More Likely to Beat, Sexually Abuse Their Wives Than Heterosexual Men (15 August 2017) This article contains several dead hyperlinks – the relevant references are as follows:

The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS): 2010 Findings on Victimization by Sexual Orientation (January 2013)
Victimization Over the Life Span: A Comparison of Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual, and Heterosexual Siblings (2005)
When your rapist is a woman (30 March 2016)
Lena Dunham Didn’t Molest Her Sister, but Female-on-Female Sexual Abuse Is Real and Awful (4 November 2014)
Lesbian intimate partner violence: Prevalence and dynamics (2002)
Victimization and Perpetration Rates of Violence in Gay and Lesbian Relationships: Gender Issues Explored (1997)

Dear Feminists: Stop Denying The Connection Between Alcohol And Domestic Violence‘ by Corrine Barraclough (2 May 2017) Australia

Questions about violence against women are for all, not just migrants, by Wendy Tuohy (24 April 2017) Not even a hint that men are also victims of DV = substandard journalism for which there is no longer any excuse.

Why gender can’t be ignored when dealing with domestic violence (28 March 2017)

Domestic Violence: A Male Problem? (23 March 2017) UK

10 lies abusers tell themselves (and others). Calling out the common deceptions. (11 February 2017) Interesting article re: how abusers rationalise their actions

Flowers = Domestic Violence. Feminist hypocrisy at its peak (8 February 2017) Australia

The Duluth model is working as designed; you won’t smart mouth her again (3 February 2017)

On the psychology of domestic violence, by Ally Fogg (13 January 2017) UK

Shocking domestic abuse statistics don’t show the real picture: it’s even worse (14 December 2016) UK. This is one of several articles written by feminists in response to the recent release of stats showing the large (and increasing) number of male victims. Essentially they say ‘it doesn’t matter how many men are victims, women have it worse and we should focus entirely on them’.

Tory MP Faces Abuse From Feminist Colleagues After Opposing Sexist Bill (17 December 2016) UK

Stopping Fathers Committing Family Violence (13 December 2016) The Victorian Government (Australia) ignores female perpetrators of domestic violence – it’s something only dads do! Disgusting bias

More than one in three victims of domestic abuse are now men (10 December 2016) UK

San Antonio Judge Rules Men Not Capable of Being Victims of Domestic Violence (2016) USA

Sydney police officer breaches AVO (2 December 2016) A female officer, if that’s relevant

Should we scrutinise ALL reports of family violence? by Jasmin Newman (22 November 2016)

Domestic violence convention would make men ‘second class citizens’ (19 November 2016) Ireland

The fight against domestic violence needs to look beyond blaming men, by Stephanie Ross (6 November 2016) Australia

Governments accused of failing to fully recognise role of alcohol in family violence  (27 October 2016) Australia

Domestic violence: Perpetrators would receive warning texts and videos (21 October 2016) Australia

Black women’s lives matter too, by Nyunggai Warren Mundine AO (15 October 2016) Australia

Evidence for impact of Domestic Violence Perpetrator Programmes: College of Policing evidence commentary (undated) UK

“This ‘review of reviews’ concluded that no clear impact of DVPPs has been identified, and that effects on further victimisation have been small.”

To stop domestic violence, we need to change perpetrators’ behaviour (5 October 2016) This article in pro-feminist The Conversation completely ignores the reality of female abusers and the lack of counselling services for them.

It’s time to admit the truth about domestic violence, by David Leyonhjelm (27 September 2016) Australia

Force game-changer: Deputy Commissioner Wendy Steendam on a mission to end violence against women (23 September 2016) Australia

BBC & Notts Police Chief publicise non-existent “hate crimes” against women whilst ignoring fatal domestic violence against men (22 September 2016) UK

Why does the CPS report on violence against women include men in the stats? by Ally Fogg (7 September 2016)

Denying female domestic violence, by Augusto Zimmermann (28 August 2016)

Douglas Todd: B.C.’s domestic-violence programs based on ‘false’ theory (21 August 2016)

Always beating up on men, by Bettina Arndt (20 August 2016) Recommended reading

Gulags for New Zealand men (18 August 2016)

This is one of countless examples of how feminist DV advocacy groups seek to minimise both women’s role in perpetrating abusive behaviours, and its degree of impact on male victims.

Study findings on domestic violent present ‘challenging picture’  (16 June 2016) New Zealand

“The findings of an in-depth domestic violence study, which showed violent conduct almost evenly split between the genders, are potentially cause for concern, a senior police officer says.”

The gender of domestic violence (8 June 2016) NZ video concerning the difficulty experienced by researchers whose findings showed that women were equally likely to abuse.

Violent Parents – Calling for the End to Child Contact at Any Cost, by Jess Phillips MP (20 April 2016) UK. Article by well-known staunch feminist who implies all abusive parents are men, which as some readers point out is grossly misleading.

ABC’s Q&A program proves that ignorance is still rife about domestic violence, by Anne Summers (15 April 2016) Feminists get so angry when people dare to suggest that misogyny/gender inequality is not THE penultimate cause of domestic violence. I read this piece and think ‘pot-kettle-black’

My province’s government instructs police officers to treat domestic violence with a “gendered lens” and assume that men are perpetrators. How can this be changed? (19 April 2016) Reddit discussion thread with linked reference material. Note that male victims of DV are much more likely to report being “very dissatisfied” by their treatment at the hands of police. Is it any wonder?

Minister for Prevention of Family Violence needs to think about her own family history, by Bettina Arndt (1 April 2016) Australia

A female voice for ‘demonised’ men (16 March 2016) Australia

Changing attitudes towards domestic abuse against men (16 March 2016) UK

Why female violence against men is society’s last great taboo, by Martin Daubney (15 March 2016) UK

The Melbourne suburbs where a parent is most likely to murder their child (12 March 2016) Australia

The scandal of women’s violence towards men, by Melanie Phillips (11 March 2016) To read the full article seems to require a subscription to The Times.

Women Who Emotionally Abuse Men (29 February 2016)

Spain gender laws: A country against men (18 February 2016)

Australians are being told that gender inequality is the root cause of domestic violence. But is it?, by Gay Alcorn (19 February 2016)

Dad domestic violence victim fears courts being used as a weapon (22 January 2016) Australia

The solutions: ‘We can make it better’ | Behind Closed Doors (31 December 2015) NZ

For Nelson Women’s Refuge manager Katie O’Donnell, the solution to New Zealand’s domestic violence problem is more straightforward. “People say it’s a really complex issue. Well, it is a complex issue but also it isn’t – guys just have to stop doing it”

Vera Baird, a British regional ‘Police Commissioner’, disseminates a Christmas message implying that men who budget their finances carefully do so in order to “economically abuse” their partners (25 December 2015)

economic_abuse

Dear Daddy: Viral video highlights how sexist jokes contribute to culture of violence against women (16 December 2015) Australia. Same old stuff, demonising men and putting full responsibility on them to ‘fix’ domestic violence whilst ignoring female perpetration of violence.

Blindfolded with a White Ribbon, by Geoffrey Luck (27 November 2015) Australia

Silent Victims, by Bettina Arndt (14 November 2015) Australia

A simple solution to domestic violence, a video by Janet Bloomfield (15 October 2015)

The surprisingly common reason John hits his partner (14 October 2015) Of course a male batterer is profiled, but watch the fur fly when someone suggests a contributing factor that doesn’t fit the feminist Duluth Model.

The cause of both domestic violence and terrorism is angry men (6 October 2015)

Turnbull’s response to domestic violence ignores the evidence (6 October 2015)

Miranda Devine: Demonising men won’t stop domestic violence (27 September 2015) Australia – with an example of the predictable feminist reaction here. Miranda responded to her feminist critics firstly with this article, and then this one.

Domestic violence package: A great start, but it will only get us so far (25 September 2015) Australia

Domestic violence called “Violence against Women” (21 September 2015) A Reddit Australia discussion thread that followed an ill-informed comment by newly-installed Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull

Men’s anti-Domestic Violence advocate says scourge “is a male problem” (13 September 2015) Plenty of readers comments that are highly critical of the White Ribbon Campaign Ambassador quoted in the article

The Hidden Politics of Family Violence (8 August 2015) Australia

Why men feel aggrieved in family court interventions (11 August 2015) Australia

To change attitudes to family violence, we need a shift in gender views (22 July 2015) Disgracefully biased article from The Conversation wherein the feminist author laments Australians growing realisation that DV is not a gendered issue, dismissing this as a “misunderstanding”.

Domestic Abuse: ‘It is not a women’s issue and it is not a men’s issue. It’s a human problem’ (14 July 2015) Ireland

Lawrence Ben Eliezer on Institutionalized Feminism within the Criminal Justice System (14 July 2015) Canadian video

Retiring magistrate Ron Kilner says domestic violence laws have been exploited (11 July 2015) Australia. Interesting how politicians, judges, etc, only begin speaking freely and honestly about gender-related issues upon their retirement. (see my post on this theme here)

Family violence: the focus should be on support, not mandatory reporting (3 July 2015) This links to an article in the ABC web site, but the same article was also published in The Conversation. Feminist authors remains true to type by ignoring male victims and abusive women. Australia

Rosie Batty – The Opposite Case (28 June 2015) Australia

Patriarchy vs Facts: Domestic Violence (PART I) (23 June 2015) Video

Men experiencing or perpetrating domestic violence have higher incidence of mental health problems (20 May 2015)

Domestic violence a ‘silent epidemic’ in gay relationships (30 May 2015) Australia

Mark Latham on why Labor can’t get it right on domestic violence (16 May 2015) and the obligatory feminist bite-back (this one being one of the milder responses)

$16m for dom violence but $1.2b for terrorism (14 May 2015) Australia

UK article about the high level of violence amongst lesbian couples (7 May 2015)

Miranda Devine: The brutal truth about domestic violence (5 April 2015)

Dating violence protections empowering for young men, women (2 April 2015) USA

Violence against women should mean the end of any high profile career (30 March 2015) See great reader’s comment contributed by Mark Dent

Reddit TIL discussion thread about recent CDC research claiming more men are victims of partner abuse (23 March 2015) USA and related mensrights discussion thread

Tara Moss: ‘We can’t let trolls hijack the domestic violence conversation’ (5 March 2015) Australia. This is the feminist concept of a “conversation” – we talk & you shut-up. If you try to join our conversation then you are a troll. And, as is becoming increasingly common of late, no reader’s comments were permitted on this article.

Men forgotten in violence debate‘ by Tanveer Ahmed (9 February 2015), with follow-up article, Feminism in crisis as male supporter expresses view of his own (9 February 2015)

Domestic Violence: How taboos veil the truth‘ by Don Edgar (27 January 2015) Australia

Can domestic abusers be rehabilitated? (1 February 2015) Gynocentric/pro-feminist bias but worth reading in conjunction with the comments contributed by readers

When it comes to Domestic Violence, she says she wants equality – however when faced with a discussion of male victims – she labels it a failure and bitches about statistics #oneistoomany (25 January 2015)

Cutting off unfaithful penises, apparently justified and hilarious (15 January 2015)

Telstra introduces domestic violence leave (13 January 2015) Australia. Article implies only women are victims of domestic violence and leaves us guessing as to whether the company policy is sexist/discriminatory – or just the journalism

Domestic Violence – Donald Dutton Debunks The Gender Paradigm (25 November 2014) Youtube video

Domestic Violence Against Men: Why We Need To Pay More Attention To Vulnerable Males (6 November 2014)

5 Facts about domestic violence to consider this November (and every other month too) by Janet Bloomfield (28 October 2014)

This feminist writer has the gall to attack men’s rights groups on the basis that they are uncaring about the plight of male victims of domestic violence (21 October 2014) Be sure to peruse the readers comments

Our submission to the Home Office consultation on the strengthening of the law on domestic abuse (15 October 2014) Mike Buchanan rails against the rampant anti-male bias evident within both the UK government agencies responsible for dealing with domestic abuse, and within the advocacy groups upon which the agencies confer and rely.

Stefan Molyneux video entitled ‘Domestic violence symposium’ (16 June 2014)

Why don’t we speak up when we see signs of domestic violence? (1 October 2014) This article in a pro-feminist web site provides a stereotypical feminist perspective on the subject. What was notable was that almost all the readers comments attacked the author’s obvious anti-male bias. This article forms the focus of this blog post.

Do we give female domestic violence abusers a pass? (1 October 2014)

In this article a feminist writer, Amanda Hess, attempts to rationalise why domestic violence by a female sports star should be addressed differently than in the case of a male sports star (22 September 2014) Most of the 600+ readers  comments that followed disagreed and told her so in no uncertain terms.

Woman as aggressor: The unspoken truth of domestic violence (19 September 2014)

Trivialising and excusing violence against women (17 September 2014) Author pushes a feminist perspective but there are almost 300 reader’s comments

Women more likely to commit domestic violence, studies show (16 September 2014)

Welsh gender politics putting male and female victims at risk says men’s charity (10 September 2014)

New study of domestic violence: “Women significantly more likely to be physically aggressive” (7 July 2014)

In the US a decline in domestic violence (26 August 2014)

Children most often killed by their mothers (25 September 2012) NZ. This article covers a range of issues other than just filicide.

Is that a frying pan, or are you just unhappy to see me? (2 March 2008)

Men Are More Likely Than Women To Be Victims In Dating Violence, UNH Expert Says (19 May 2006)

http://www.thecitizen.org.au/features/what-about-men-lies-statistics-and-peddling-myths-about-violence-against-women A pro-feminist article that tries to appear even-handed, but it’s worth reading by virtue of the level of detail provided with additional info provided in readers comments.

‘Lollies at a childrens party and other myths: Violence, protection orders and fathers rights groups’ by Miranda Kaye and Julia Tomie (1998). Another detailed but flawed paper in support of the feminist position on DV. Its main line of attack is that available statistics don’t support claims made by men’s rights advocates. It conveniently ignores the fact that most Australian DV research is undertaken by feminists and biased towards finding ‘evidence’ to support a pre-determined conclusion. Thus the accuracy and impartiality of the research is the real issue, rather than the credibility of the whistle-blowers.

The paper also misinterprets and/or takes out of context, many of the comments it attributes to fathers groups in an attempt to portray them as irrational or unreasonable. Finally the authors attack specific statements put forward by fathers groups despite the same arguments having been used (at other times) by feminists in support of their own (feminist) perspective. The authors of this paper, for example, want to jump from one camp to the other (and back again) in relation to the issue of whether behaviour other than physical violence should be included in the definition of domestic violence.

The Modern Day Ducking Stool: Domestic Abuse Programs and Man Shaming (16 August 2014)

More male abuse survivors in rural Ireland are seeking help (27 July 2014)

The Domestic Violence Method (January 2015) Australia

50 domestic violence myths (27 December 2013) USA

Are men really victims of intimate partner violence? (2011) Australia

Women are more violent says study (12 November 2000)

Researcher says women’s initiation of domestic violence predicts risks to women (6 July 2009)

More than 40% domestic violence victims are male, report reveals (5 September 2010) with related discussion thread here (worth reading)

The Gender Paradigm in domestic violence research and theory (2005) Includes coverage of the claim that women engage in violence mainly due to self-defence.

Intimate partner abuse of men (Edith Cowan University, 2010)

Domestic violence: Women abusers on the rise (23 June 2009) Australia

Violent women by Lynette Haas (appeared in the Sunday Mail, 28 March 1999)

Husband abuse: Fact or Fiction by Dr Sotirios Sarantakos (Australia)

Deconstructing Self-Defence in Wife-to-Husband Violence by Dr Sotirios Sarantakos (Australia)

Domestic Violence and the Male Victim by  Anne Lewis & Dr Sotirios Sarantakos (Australia)

Wikipedia entry on domestic violence against men

Domestic abuse community punishments ban planned by Labour (27 July 2014) And unsurprisingly, no mention of male victims.

Sorry for being a man (NZ politician) Youtube video

We need to show it’s just not manly to hit out (9 July 2014) Nonsense article dripping with white knight bias … “The idea that the woman may be equally to blame, even if she is also violent and even the initiator of the violence, is simply not acceptable”

Society’s acceptance of domestic violence? (12 March 2013)

Youtube video interview on DV with Erin Pizzey, Senator Anne Cools & Dr. Martin Fiebert

http://time.com/2921491/hope-solo-women-violence/ (25 June 2014) with related discussion at http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/2942ji/double_standards_that_cause_womens_violence/?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Christina Hoff Sommers on violence against women (Youtube video)

Women ‘more likely to hit their partners’ (25 June 2014), ‘Rise of female relationship terrorists: Study finds women are more controlling’ (26 June 2014), ‘Relationship terrorists study‘ (25 June 2014), Women are more controlling and aggressive than men (26 June 2014), ‘Women more likely to be aggressive in relationships‘, and ‘Confessions of an intimate terrorist‘ Reddit discussion thread and linked article (27 June 2014)

Mothers ‘faking domestic violence’ to keep their children, inquiry told (24 June 2014) Yes, Therese (Edwards), domestic violence IS under-reported, especially those incidents involving female perpetrators – but I doubt that your National Council has expressed any concerns about that issue. By way of background, this article concerns submissions to an Australian government Inquiry into Child Support.

More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals (22 June 2014)

When a woman hits a man it’s justified (21 June 2014)

The fallacious stereotype of ‘male violence’ and why it’s being sold to you (11 June 2014) Good Australian article by Adam Blanch. This attracted a spiteful, biased and misleading rebuttal from a feminist by the name of Caitlin Roper. Caitlin herself had earlier published her own item about domestic violence, a response to which was subsequently penned by Australian MRA Greg Canning.

Senator Anne Cools at Toronto conference on domestic violence (2014, video)

Daisy Kler lying to the public by Diana Davison and John Hembling (26 May 2014)

Shifting the gender bias (19 April 2014) An example of one of the all-too-few media articles that recognise and are sympathetic to male victims of DV

VAWA: The American Feminists’ Abuse Industry by Hunter Brooks

The silence of domestic violence

A reddit discussion thread about the anti-male bias evident in the web site of an American domestic violence centre’s web site. Unfortunately such bias (i.e. stating or implying that all men accessing the site are abusers and that all women are victims) is also common in domestic violence centres in Australia.

Male victims of DV who call the police are more likely to be arrested than the female perpetrator (A discussion thread on reddit/mensrights) and then see this article

Solange and Jay-Z: It’s simply not the same if a man is hit by a woman (18 May 2014)

She punched him but he is bigger, so he is deemed the “primary aggressor” (6 May 2014)

http://judgybitch.com/tag/have-you-ever-beat-up-a-boyfriend/

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/thinking-man/10752232/Our-attitude-to-violence-against-men-is-out-of-date.html

http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/brand-what-do-you-do-when-a-girl-hits-you/

Invisible victims: When men are abused

Signs of an abuser apply to women as well as men

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gekyg7yy4Dc&feature=plcp (a ‘Girl Writes What’ video)

http://www.eurekastreet.com.au/article.aspx?aeid=38186#.U0zOOlWSySo (This article has an anti-male bias but there are some good references cited within the readers comments)

http://www.itv.com/news/wales/story/2014-04-07/instances-of-male-domestic-abuse-increases-in-wales/#men-reporting-domestic-abuse-rises-across-wales_346689

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/10815810/Nagging-could-cost-the-lives-of-hundreds-of-men.html

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence

http://www.oneinthree.com.au/malevictims/

http://whatmenthinkofwomen.blogspot.com.au/2013/07/dr-greg-canning-on-domestic-violence.html

http://www.drceli.com.au/blogs/elizabeth-celi-blog/2011/11/19/male-victims-of-domestic-abuse—an-under-served-group-of-men

http://twnow.com/tech-founder-in-shocking-domestic-abuse-case/ (29 April 2014)

http://www.batteredmen.com/

http://j4mb.wordpress.com/2014/01/11/vera-bairds-response-to-our-recent-public-challenge-concerning-domestic-violence/

http://www.australianmensrights.com/Domestic_Violence_Statistics-Child_Abuse_Australia/National_Times_Really-Women_Bash_Men-Violent_Women_Australia-Study_Kim_Halford_08MAR2011.aspx

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This blog contains many other posts that discuss the issue of domestic violence – Please click here to see a list of relevant posts.

Posts addressing other related issues can be accessed by clicking on the relevant topic ‘tags’ at the base of this page.