courtship – Prawn of the Patriarchy

Bin chickens

Well dear readers, my family was eating lunch at a cafe today. At a nearby table was a large group of teen girls with a couple of totem male friends (unsurprisingly, placed on the end of the table). As is now so often the case, they were inclined towards the noisy, vulgar and skimpily-dressed end of the spectrum.

My wife said to our son something along the lines of ‘don’t even think about bringing one of them home … we’re not sharing our stuff with the likes of them. If you want to be exploited, don’t get us involved.’ She’s only a small ‘f’ feminist, you see.

We briefly spoke about the need for him to exercise careful judgement in this regard, drawing on a couple of personal examples we know of.

Oh, and there was also a bird doing the rounds at the cafe too. An ibis. A waitress stopped and asked me if it was bothering me. ‘No’, I said. ‘I’m used to them by now’. My son mentioned that the popular name for these birds was ‘bin chickens’. They seem to be a bit like feathered rats, poking around much of the the time to get a free feed.

Which brings me to the point of this post. It’s a worrying time to have a teenage son. If you’re in the same situation, what are you doing to get him ready for the coming onslaught? And sex is only part of it.

Are you putting a book or books on his pillow? If so, which ones? One possibility might be Jordan B Peterson, for example.

What are you telling your son/s, and what are you leaving for him/them to discover for themselves?

I’m personally curious. Not asking for a friend.

See also:

The rise of the ibis: How the ‘bin chicken’ became a totem for modern Australia (7 September 2018) Possibly one of the most informative & entertaining articles ever to grace ‘The Conversation‘ website.

Elsewhere in this blog:

On boys and education

Who pays on dates?

Len & The Lamprey: The other side to the issue of financial abuse

Feminism and Buddhism – Another shared cafe experience but with female attendees drawn from the next higher age group. And I don’t remember there being any birds present.

On modern dating culture #Cringe

My source of inspiration for this post was an article entitled ‘Modern dating culture has turned me into a bitch‘ by Andrea Wesley.

Whilst reading this it occurred to me that, with just a few modifications, it might have been written by a guy in relation to his unsatisfactory dating experiences (though no one would publish it, as it would be considered misogynistic and brimful of ‘whataboutery’.

I have been meaning to create a post about dating for some time now. There are already, however, a selection of articles regarding dating/courtship in the following posts:

The ‘Marriage Strike’ and MGTOW
Apparently there’s not enough “educated” men nowadays
Don’t look at me! No wait. Look at me!
Who pays on dates?

Talk to me

Nice guys, nice guys™ and the friendzone
Men & women and their attitudes to marriage and parenthood

Anyway, so how about I make an attempt at modifying Andrea’s article myself in order to reveal the male perspective? Here goes …

Believe it or not, once upon a time I was just a caring, optimistic guy looking for love in my life. I minded my Ps and Qs, showed my genuine kindness and enthusiasm and behaved with grace with every girl I met. One by one, my enthusiasm went from George Clooney sweet to burn all of your crap ??? Beyonce — I’m literally over these entitled narcissists that make up the majority of our dating pool. I wasn’t always a douchebag, but modern dating culture made me this way.

1. THE FISH IN THE SEA HAVE TURNED INTO MUTANTS IN THE SEWER. It used to be that coming across good girls, or at least girls with actual normal manners, weren’t so few and far between. These days, you have to hike up Everest and nearly die of hypothermia before you come across a small glimmer of hope. How is it possible for so many bitches to exist at one time? Ugh.

2. MOST GIRLS AREN’T WORTH PUTTING ON PANTS FOR. Getting ready for another date just to sit across from a girl who talks about her needs and continually seeks validation makes me want to vomit in my beer. I’d rather sit at home in comfort, blissfully unaware of the flake I’m not missing out on.

3. I LIKE NETFLIX MORE THAN DEALING WITH ACTUAL WOMEN. Who needs a girlfriend when I can sit in my jocks with a beer and marathon through the new season of House of Cards. That’s right, no one. Stress-free relaxation is just a button press away.

4. IT’S HARD TO BELIEVE GOOD GIRLS ARE STILL OUT THERE. In all honesty, I’ve met so many douche canoes that I’m starting to wonder if real and grown-ass women still exist. Are you out there? Hello? Will the real good girls please stand the hell up? Geez.

5. I’M SICK OF COMPETING. I didn’t sign up for any BS reality TV type of love, so forgive me if I’m not about to be just another contestant in the lineup. No one dates honestly anymore, so why should I care about dating at all?

6. THERE’S ZERO EFFORT MADE THESE DAYS, SO WHY AM I WASTING MY ENERGY? I’m rarely impressed by women now and it’s not because of anything they did wrong; it’s more the expectation that they’re going to be a huge disappointment like every flake before them. I’d like to be hopeful that one woman will eventually change my mind, but I have yet to come across a woman who isn’t a lazy jerk that just wants me to buy her stuff and shower her with attention. So forgive me if I’m not swooning with charm right off the bat — she needs to earn it first.

7. I’VE BEEN GHOSTED ONE TOO MANY TIMES. I haven’t been ghosted just once or twice — it’s literally 80% of the time I meet someone. Women these days just cower and turn into ill-mannered jerks that can’t formulate a simple sentence to say goodbye. After about a dozen, I stopped caring to go above and beyond to remain the nice guy. I’m done.

(I gave up at doing the gender swap thing at this point, but you get it? Right?)

8. I’M SICK OF BEING TREATED LIKE A SEXUAL OBJECT. Because why would I want to subject myself to a selfish idiot who doesn’t respect me as a person and just wants my body? I’m perfectly good at satisfying myself. I don’t need to subject myself to one more loser who is most likely going to activate my bitch flag just so he can feel temporary enjoyment. No thanks.

9. BEING A BITCH FEELS INFINITELY BETTER THAN BEING A DOORMAT. I refuse to let myself fall back into the trap of being a doe-eyed princess looking for her Prince Charming — I’m over it. I used to be naive and I used to wish for my fairy tale ending until one too many penis pictures brought me back to earth. It’s a dog eat dog world out there when it comes to dating and I’m done getting taken down by being too weak. Bitch mode is on and it’s here to stay … unless my unicorn finally falls from the sky in front of me.

10. I’VE LITERALLY RUN OUT OF CARE. It’s not that I’m a complete bitch — I have a good side too, but I’m sick of giving it out freely to guys who end up walking all over me and taking advantage of my kindness. From now on, if you want me to put on pants and leave my apartment for you, you need to show me some real respect first. If you don’t, you’ll be meeting the bitch soon. I have zero care left.

See also:

30yo reveals question single Aussie men don’t ask anymore (1 September 2024) Yet another one of these articles written by some embittered hit-the-wall woman who has never bothered to read/discuss the male perspective on the issues she raises.

Man’s voice note reveals just how hard modern dating is (30 August 2024) On and on about all the things that men do wrong (Part #353) Not like women

The Dating Pool Drop-outs (September 2023) Article by a female journalist who pretended to be a guy in dating apps, and related discussions

New dating trend that builds on ghosting emerges (26 April 2023) If it involves women feeling they’ve been unfairly treated then it’s a crisis, otherwise, suck it up lads.

Psychologist explains why men always turn nasty when rejected (21 February 2023) In my experience, I would assert that women are *far* more likely to turn nasty

Why do hardly any straight men write about sex and dating? (30 January 2023) Twitter discussion thread here. See also this post.

Man’s text exposes ‘brutal’ TikTok dating trend (23 April 2022) Men put up with put-downs from the time they hit puberty, but if/when they return the favor then it’s suddenly an “alarming trend”. Welcome to gender equality ladies.

Wait. Is this how women actually view the men that they date? (17 December 2021) Video

‘Sales funnels’ and high-value men: the rise of strategic dating | Dating | The Guardian (8 August 2021)

The glorious rise in men who won’t date feminists (14 February 2020) Video

Sexual aggression on dating apps is the ultimate male privilege (7 February 2020) Of course, and as always, it’s only male behaviour that’s problematic and which needs to be remedied.

Young women at Griffith University (Australia) get tips about what to expect/demand in a special dating guide. (February 2020) Gee, hope they enjoy the company of cats.

Man won’t date woke women. World ends (25 January 2020) Video

The dangerous rise of men who won’t date ‘Woke’ women (22 January 2020) Be sure to take in the reader’s comments section

How to have a successful long-term relationship, Part 1, by Suzanne Venker (22 March 2019)

Why men are withdrawing from courtship, by Dalrock (15 November 2013) Recommended reading

Qualities of the Prince (14 December 2011) Flipping the gender roles, by Rollo Tomassi

And on a parting note, I wonder what it’s like for lesbians. Better, right? (Source)

On housework and ’emotional labour’

You might well have noticed articles regularly appearing on the above topics. Almost without exception the theme is one of men as unappreciative, lazy, selfish, oafs. We are told that women who are in heterosexual relationships are routinely forced to pick up the slack, and consequently are left feeling unhappy and disadvantaged.

Until now I collated articles on this theme in (mostly) the following blog posts:

The ‘Marriage Strike’ and MGTOW
Men & women and their attitudes to marriage and parenthood

From this point forward, however, I’ll consolidate all such articles in this new post, and progressively add my own commentary.

Related references:

Battling parents win landmark ruling stating ’emotional abuse’ led to teen daughter’s suicide (13 July 2024) UK

‘They are men … they do nothing’: inside the home lives of women around the world (3 April 2023)

Women work harder than men – phooey! Another great article by Bettina Arndt (31 March 2023)

My man does more chores than me and people think he’ll leave me (11 October 2022) Australian feminist journo, Mary Madigan, just doesn’t get it

Ridiculously easy way men can improve their sex life (23 August 2022) Now scroll down this page to the contrasting “… have less sex” link

Twitter discussion thread on men’s contribution to work and household duties (4 March 2022)

6 Reasons men need to stop making the first move in dating (7 March 2021)

The wage gap is created by women and reflects female financial privilege over men (17 November 2019) A reddit mens rights discussion thread

Men aren’t defective women. They’re men (24 September 2019)

Bettina Arndt looks at housework (10 April 2019) Video

OECD: Time spent in paid and unpaid work, by sex (undated) When you add paid & unpaid work together then gender differences all but disappear.

Sharing the parenting duties could be key to marital bliss: study (3 October 2017)

Most of the articles on this theme don’t acknowledge that men are, on average, doing more around the house than they have ever done before. This article bucks the trend:

“Although men have increased their housework time since the 1970s, they more typically perform the least-urgent chores, like changing lightbulbs or car maintenance”. Err, thanks for the bouquet

Stop calling women nags – We’re just fed up (27 September 2017)

Gender equality begins at home: empty the dishwasher, guys, by Judith Ireland (1 May 2015) and related reddit mensrights discussion thread. And here is a February 2017 article on the same theme.

At home, women treat men as if they are barely competent (10 February 2015)

The two articles below argue a case that’s somewhat different to the usual feminist assertions:

Men Who Do More Housework Have Less Sex (1 April 2013)

The More Chores A Husband Does, The More Likely The Marriage Will End In Divorce (28 September 2012)

Apparently there’s not enough “educated” men nowadays

Until recently articles about women having trouble finding/securing dating or marriage partners were often quoted as querying “Where have all the good men gone?“. I talk about this in another post called ‘MGTOW and the Marriage Strike‘.

The rationale is that men are deficient in that they are failing in their responsibilities (to women) through their immaturity and/or by simply not trying hard enough to please. There is never a suggestion of any shortcomings on the part of women.

I’ve noticed we seem to be transitioning to a new meme, similar yet different to the last. In this one men are still deficient – they are now said to be playing video games instead of doing the work or study necessary to improve their educational/financial position.

We are told that educated women are complaining because, apparently, there are not enough “educated” men to partner with. Here’s an example of an article on this theme (with a response from an MRA here). As a consequence, these privileged women say, they must freeze their eggs and/or become solo parents by way of artificial insemination, etc.

Of course it would make sense to delve deeper into why men are staying home playing video games and/or are becoming increasingly under-represented in universities, but the debate stalls at the shaming stage. Because … still no suggestion of any shortcomings or blame on the part of women. (This blog entry illustrates what might otherwise be said and discussed)

I saw this program about solo parenthood on TV the other night. Interesting, though very much gynocentric in terms of the issues explored/presented. I saw women who had quite negative attitudes towards men and/or who freely admitted that they were not prepared to compromise in terms of any aspect of potential traditional pairings. On the other hand they were most willing to compromise their independent/empowered woman status when it came to having others around them support and/or subsidise their lifestyle choice.

The perspective of straight men and their attitudes and experiences was not addressed. Sperm donors who chose not to establish/maintain contact with their offspring were presented as insensitive cads. No hint was provided as to what other factors that might have contributed to their behaviour, for e.g. the possibility of being lumbered with eighteen years of child support payments.

Then I read firstly this article, then another, and another, these being just a few examples of a spate of pieces on this theme. As is often the case, there were some quite illuminating reader’s comments following each, including this offering:

“Feminism is already a dead woman walking. All feminism has is shaming language and the State (ironically, ultimately other men) to keep men to the feminist line.

But now, increasingly, the shaming doesn’t work. And men are disengaging from society in general to avoid entanglements with the state; if you don’t get married, you can’t be divorced, if you don’t co-habit you can’t have half your stuff appropriated, if you don’t have children, you can’t be on the hook for child support, if you don’t enter the corporate world you can’t be be accused of ‘harassment’ and if you don’t date you drastically reduce your chance of a false rape accusation.

These are genuine threat points for men in the modern world that didn’t exist before feminism. It speaks to the feeble minds of feminists that they would think that men will simply carry on as they did when these threats did not exist. For the last 50 years men (mostly) still did. But that’s over now.

So men are doing what they have always done: survey their environment, understand it, and behave rationally according to it. Which means, increasingly, living their lives without regard to what women want. This does not mean living without sex, relationships or female company. Just that the investment men make in all these areas is being dramatically reduced.

As feminism reduces the value of women (in men’s eyes), so men are reducing the amount of time, effort, attention and money they are willing to spend for the declining benefits modern women now bring to their lives.

But the real news is that the true cost of feminism, first born by men, and then children, is now being passed on to women. Record numbers of women are living alone, record numbers of women are childless, record numbers are on psychiatric medication, record numbers are facing a life-time of wage slavery in grinding jobs that they can never leave. And still feminism spins these outcomes as the conscious choices of these women and as ’empowering’.

And yet, women’s self-reported happiness, across all classes, all races, all demographics is lower than ever since records began 50 years ago. Tellingly, for the first time ever, their happiness is also now lower than men’s.

But you do not need to read ‘The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness’ to know this. Just talk to the increasing number of 30 and 40 year old childless spinsters one on one – not in a group – to get the REAL story. The REAL effect of feminism in the REAL world. These women don’t give two hoots about feminism, they are just wondering where all the good husbands, hell, ANY decent man, went.

Mostly, disgusted with what feminism has done to women, he walked away.

For the truth is that men don’t want to fight women, it goes against the core of what it means to be a man. But feminism thrust men into a fight that they neither started nor wanted. To the point that feminists are reduced to crowing about ‘winning’ battles that men never turned up for.

And even now, as feminism pushes and pushes and pushes to ever more absurd levels, as ever more restrictions are placed on normal masculine behavior, ever more insane definitions of ‘rape’, ‘assault’, and ‘aggression’ are drafted into law in increasingly desperate attempts to somehow, anyhow, cast women as perpetual victims – even now – men are still refusing to be drawn into a real battle.

That’s how deeply men do not want to fight women.

The sound of the final battle between the sexes will not be heard in the streets or legislatures. It will not be televised or reported. There will be no flags hoisted or victory parades. Because it is already in progress. It is happening all around us in plain sight, for those with the eyes to see it.

And men are deploying the most devastating weapon of all – indifference. In this final battle who cares least wins.

The time has come to reap the harvest of feminism, and for women the fruit will be bitterest of all.”

And here is further evidence of the feminist hive-mind in action with another series of almost identical articles on a related theme – young men allegedly addicted to video games:

Dating, relationships and the lies told young women (6 July 2022)

On Tinder, only women have a preference for highly-educated partners (24 July 2019)

Unemployed and don’t care: why young men aren’t working (1 April 2017) A sexist hit-piece in a professional journal of all places. The author wilfully confuses cause & effect when discussing unemployment amongst young men. See reader’s comments including:

“placing the blame of men not working on video games seems like such a stretch of the imagination as to be unbelievable”

‘The curious political effect of men losing their breadwinner role, by Jena McGregor (24 April 2017)

‘Why Some Men Don’t Work: Video Games Have Gotten Really Good‘ (3 July 2017)

Will Darwinism kill Feminism? (7 July 2017) A great offering on the issue from Martin Daubney

‘We’re losing a whole generation of young men to video games‘ (8 July 2017)

Link between young men spending more time gaming and less working (13 July 2017)

It’s not just young men — everyone’s playing a lot more video games (11 July 2017) Oh gee, someone finally provided corresponding stats for women

No eligible men (10 July 2017) This video kind of sums it all up

The College dating divide (20 February 2023)

Critics Tell Young Men that Their Penises are NOT Golden (But They Are) (15 September 2022) by Janice Fiamengo. Recommended reading

Meet the women who believe they’re ‘too hot’ to land a date (6 April 2022) What a joke – so if the fault isn’t some lack on the part of the guys, then it must be that the women are (drumroll) too wonderful … or both of the above!

The game of marriage chicken, by Bettina Arndt (3 March 2022)

How ‘Golden Penis Syndrome’ is ruining dating for university women (2 November 2021) Sickening response from the feminist set to a man shortage that they facilitated

What is hybristophilia: Why women are attracted to killers like Chris Watts | news.com.au (7 September 2021) On a contrasting note, apparently some women prefer traits other than high education.

High income men have high value as long-term mates in the U.S.: personal income and the probability of marriage, divorce, and childbearing in the U.S. – ScienceDirect (September 2021)

‘Sales funnels’ and high-value men: the rise of strategic dating | Dating | The Guardian (8 August 2021)

Covid-19: ‘Entitled’ millennial’s fertility whinge angers Australia (news.com.au) (2 August 2021) Yes, let’s drag in the Covid19 theme, heck why not?

Why women are experiencing a ‘man drought’ in QLD dating scene | The Courier Mail (22 May 2021)

Women admit that marriage is prostitution, and they like it that way (10 September 2019) Another worthwhile video in the ‘Regarding Men‘ series

Women freeze their eggs to allow men to get ahead in their careers (3 July 2018) UK

D’oh! Women ‘marrying down’ as men become less educated (9 November 2017) with related Reddit discussion thread here

The second half of this Sargon of Akkad video deals with the ‘lack of educated men’ issue (October 2017)

‘Marrying up’ is now easier for men, improves their economic well-being, study finds (28 August 2017) I think they really mean ‘marrying up should now be easier for men’. And again, if the genders were reversed, there would certainly not be the same meek acceptance of the women being failed by the education system.

College-Educated Women Can’t Find Good Men – What’s to blame? (3 February 2016)

The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women, by David M Buss (January 2016) USA. An article written by a male academic, but from a wholly gynocentric perspective.

These women can’t find enough marriageable men (24 September 2015) and related reddit discussion thread here

Rich educated women cannot find husbands and it’s all your fault, by Sargon of Akkad (10 May 2015) Video

Where are all the smart men? (3 May 2015) New Zealand with related reddit mensrights discussion threads here and here. A separate, and even more ignorant editorial here concludes with “The failure of men to foot it with them educationally in equal numbers is no reason to change the education system or promote men undeservedly. The shortage of partners for highly educated women is a problem only men can solve. Get your credentials, boys.”

(Source of the above block of text)

Some other related posts within this blog:

On boys and education
Men & women and their attitudes to marriage and parenthood
How men are portrayed … Haw Haw Haw! The jokes on us
We’ve all heard of the gender ‘income gap’, but what about the ‘expense gap’?

Who pays on dates?

There have been, and there continues to be, many articles written about the topic of who should meet the costs of dating or courtship. Most articles appear to be written by women, and mocking (to varying degrees) the alleged or implied cheapness of men who dare object to paying the entire cost of a night out.

Whilst hardly a ‘life or death’ matter, this topic has special significance in that it illustrates how some traditional gender roles are aggressively retained whilst others are forcefully discarded. With the former all appearing to benefit women.

A number of justifications are put forward as to why one partner should pay for the other. Perhaps the most common is the suggestion that the person who makes the approach, and issues the invitation, should pay for the date. That is clearly very convenient for women given that 99 times out of 100, the male is the one doing the asking (this being yet another retained gender stereotype).

After that, the rationalisations as to why men should pay get even more ‘out there’ … especially when it is a feminist at the keyboard. Consider for example, ‘I Let Him Pay for Dinner – Am I a Bad Feminist?‘ by Suzanna Weiss (5 July 2016)

My own position is that if the costs of dates aren’t shared, or if partners aren’t treated on alternate dates, then it is free-loading no matter how you dress it up. And if the first date is such that you know there won’t be a second one, then you should definitely split the bill. Forget ideology, it’s just the decent thing to do.

And now the gender wage gap, in an increasing number of employment segments, is actually reversed (i.e. favors women). This means that in more and more instances, the female dinner-goer would have a more substantial income than her male partner (see related post). Surely now, women would be proud to pay their own way. Ha, ha, yes, I’m only kidding.

A number of relevant articles now follow:

Influencer says men ‘should pay on the first date’ because women spend a lot on make-up (20 March 2024)

Surprisingly traditional dating ‘rule’ Gen Z men won’t let go (13 February 2024)

Reason men should always pay on the first date (10 January 2024)

People need to chill about women getting ‘free food’ on dates (13 July 2021)

Woman, 26, forced to pick up $500 dinner date bill (24 November 2023) And not just any woman, but an “adult content creator”.

The $2000 dating rule to avoid ‘frightful’ sex syndrome from men (2 November 2023) More dating wisdom from Jana Hocking

Why men feel entitled to sex if they pay on a first date (14 March 2023)

‘Extreme’ response to date’s $4.50 burger concern backfires massively (13 March 2023)

Splitting the bill on dates makes no sense (14 February 2023) No, what’s make no sense is investing several minutes in reading this feminist contrived nonsense.

Woman went on six dates a week, didn’t grocery shop for two years (24 January 2023)

Woman Sues Man For $10,000 For Failing To Show Up To A Date (20 July 2022)

Woman blasts her date for not paying after she said no to sex (24 June 2022)

Why men should always pay on the first date (20 April 2022)

Abbie Chatfield angers Italian men after calling out ‘sexist’ menus (7 April 2022) How ridiculous is this? Abbie and the sisterhood should all pay their share, and they’re welcome to have a menu with prices. The thing is, they don’t want to know prices in order to pay – they want to know in order to be able to gloat.

Single woman says men shouldn’t get a second date if they don’t pay (4 April 2022)

Woman left stunned by date’s split bill request (6 December 2021) “A man should pay everything and should bring you a gift for spending your time with him, commented one woman.”

Woman’s bad date disaster goes viral: ‘He bought food for himself’ (13 November 2021)

Jana Hocking on why men should always pay on the first date (4 December 2020)

Feminists on Twitter get upset that man on a date doesn’t pay for a cake for his date (1 March 2020)

Young women at Griffith University (Australia) get tips about what to expect/demand in a special dating guide. (February 2020) Gee, hope they enjoy the company of cats.

10 Reasons Why Women Should Expect Men to Still Pay for Everything | by Fox | Medium (22 January 2020)

Forget the booty call, the foodie call is the new dating (out)rage (6 July 2019)

A third of women only date men because of the free food: study (21 June 2019) USA

‘Serial Dine-and-Dasher’ arrested for awful dating etiquette (29 August 2018) And would a women be reported to the police? I think we know the answer to that

Beware of ‘foodie call’ dates who are just in it for a free meal (30 August 2017) USA

Women forced to pay for dates (9 March 2017) Video

How is it okay for a stranger to pay for your first-date dinner because he’s a man? (27 January 2017)

6 Things a Feminist Woman Who Dates Men Should Look For on a First Date: Validate his every political and social view conforms to those you require. Offer to pay and think of him as cheap if he accepts (27 October 2016) Reddit mensrights discussion thread and linked article.

A Women’s Advantage (2016) Concerns research into OKCupid users, not just regarding who pays on dates but also courtship protocols generally.

Guy texts girl demanding she pay him back after he bought her a drink at a bar (12 September 2016)

“I’ll be more cautious who I take free drinks from in the future!” Free?

Lizzie Cundy slammed by viewers for insisting a man should always pay on a first date (31 August 2016)

Woman Says She Was Left With $163 Tab After Man She Met On Dating Site Dined, Then Dashed (3 August 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here

“Operation: No Pay May”: A Houston Woman Attempts 31 Dates in 31 Days (31 May 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here

The new economics of dating: Do men still need to pay? (24 May 2016) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

For men, finding love is still more costly (16 May 2016)

I said no to a second date so he asked for a $40 refund (11 May 2016)

That’s rich… women decline to date men who earn less – however good looking (3 February 2016) UK

Shock horror! A man feels I should pay my own way on dates. “I feel this is a dealbreaker.” Welcome to feminism (9 November 2015) Reddit mensrights discussion thread

Attention, straight men dating women: Here’s why they still — yes, still — expect you to pick up the check (28 August 2015) with related reddit discussion thread here

Paying while dating: meet the men who pick up the check (and those who don’t) (28 August 2015) and being in The Guardian we just know which team they’ll be rooting for.

Two Strong INDEPENDENT Feminists demand men pay for dates (18 August 2015) Video and related reddit discussion thread (Quote: “I understand most women don’t want to be used as sex objects. Maybe they should stop looking at men as success objects“)

Ladies, It’s Now Your Turn to Pay On the First Date (9 January 2015)

Cha-Ching! Guess who spends the most in love? (February 2015)

Valentine’s Day spending driven by single men in search for love (12 February 2015)

Who Pays for Dates? Following Versus Challenging Gender Norms (2015)

Why women should never go halves on a date (27 November 2014)

‘Why I’d never be with a man who always pays the bill‘ (28 September 2014) Article unconvincing but see readers comments

It’s 2014: Why are men still paying for first dates? (18 September 2014) and here’s the feminist perspective on that issue (though note that not all readers agreed with her assessment)

Helena Andrews explains why men should always pay for dinner by Janet Bloomfield (9 September 2013)

Should I Pay for a Date Simply Because I Am the Stud? (6 September 2013)

I just made a woman pay for her own food, her reactions were interesting (19 November 2014) Reddit mensrights discussion thread

Valentines Day, by the numbers (14 February 2013)

Almost all of the articles on this subject in the mainstream media focus on heterosexual couples, and are set in the context of first world western countries.

The heterosexual focus is interesting as my initial impression is that courtship costs are approached in a somewhat more egalitarian manner in gay/lesbian relationships. I have listed some articles about splitting costs & gay/lesbian dating and courtship below. If readers can suggest more and/or better references then please leave a message.

Who Should Be Paying on a Same Sex Date? (11 May 2016)

Who picks up the tab on a date between two gay people?

When two gay men (or ladies) go on a date who pays?

Feminism and Buddhism

I was sitting in a small restaurant in a place called Chiang Dao the other day. At the next table were a group of four American women in their late 20’s or early 30’s. Western woman sitting alone is a common sight in Thailand, but sometimes – as on this occasion – they meet up for a coffee and chat.

Unfortunately I couldn’t but help to overhear their conversation. Were they talking about the beautiful natural environment all about them? No. Perhaps they were discussing the abundant cultural attractions? Nope. They were dissecting their experiences with guys they had met on their travels.

More specifically, they were discussing all the things that those guys had said or done or been, that rendered them unattractive as partners – or even as human beings. According to their toxic banter every one of those men was a loser. It was a bit like the girls described in this article, but ten years on.

With such an unpleasant demeanour, and competition from far more graceful and kindly locals (pictured below), I do hope those female tourists enjoy their solo journey … for the remainder of their holidays and beyond.

My next stop, just a kilometre or two down the road, was a famous Buddhist retreat where, thankfully, I managed to restore my sense of calm.

Now those women in the restaurant may or may not consider themselves to be feminists. I guess it is possible that they were merely ordinary folk who had been touched with the nasty stick.

Nevertheless on returning home that encounter got me thinking about whether anyone had written anything about feminism and Buddhism, and so I got busy with google and soon found a few references (below).

This blog post entitled Misandry and Mahayana (9 January 2011) is as good a starting point as any.

“I do not intend to be critical, but I simply do not understand how misandry and Mahayana are supposed to fit. Are you professing to adhere to a particular faith, and then immediately bending that faith to suit your neuroses? Are you taking refuge in the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha for the benefit of all sentient beings just so long as no men are involved? …

Misandry — contempt of men — together with misogyny — contempt of women — are nothing more than gender-specific expressions of misanthropy — hatred of human beings. Since this is the very opposite of Buddhism, why should we give any voice at all to such thinking? Why should we pay this any attention, or give it any ground? Isn’t this something we should try to overcome?”

See also:

Another post that touches on western women in Thailand is here

Some relevant discussion threads from reddit/r/buddhism (ongoing)

Dalai Lama’s ‘sexist’ quip ruffles equality activists (25 September 2015)

Women and gender politics in Buddhism (9 May 2009)

Supporting equality for women in Thai monasteries (22 December 2014)

Explorations in Buddhism and Feminism (8 March 2013)

Wikipedia entry for ‘Buddhist Feminism’

To be continued

We’ve all heard of the gender ‘income gap’, but what about the ‘expense gap’?

In two other posts within this blog I explore the concept of the gender wage gap:

How feminists misrepresent the gender ‘income gap’, and
That tired old feminist chestnut that is the ‘gender wage gap’ resurrected in Australia

Those posts found that the ‘wage gap’ is an issue that is persistently misrepresented by the feminist lobby, and that differentials in salary are generally reflective of personal choice rather than gender discrimination in the workplace.

This post explores the notion that there is a flip-side to the ‘wage gap’, that I label the gender ‘expense gap’. This concept is borne from the premise that men/boys incur significant additional expense, in comparison to women, to access or obtain various goods or services and/or to perform the role that western society demands of them.

The existence of a gender expense/cost gap is addressed in the media from time to time, but such discussions are limited to the gynocentric meme of a ‘pink tax’. Such articles, examples of which are provided below, focus on women paying more for retail products such as shavers, fashion, haircuts and sanitary products. The reality that men pay more than women for other goods/services is overlooked.

Tesco cuts price of women’s razors so they cost the same as men’s (2 January 2017) UK
NYC pharmacy introduces ‘man tax’ provoking protests which it labels ‘hate’ (14 October 2016) USA
The Pink Tax (25 August 2016) A video by ‘ShoeOnHead’ (a female MRA)
The ‘tampon tax’ is not a marginal issue – it’s the force of structural sexism at work (25 July 2016) USA
This Is How Much More It Costs To Be A Woman (2 April 2016)
Price discrimination isn’t only about pink razors (6 February 2016) UK
‘Pink tax’ angers women from New York to London (3 February 2016)
CBS News goes undercover to reveal gender price discrimination (25 January 2016)
Pink premium? There are greater problems (24 January 2016)
Britain’s ‘sexist’ high streets: How women are being charged TWICE as much as men for almost identical items (19 January 2016)
Ever heard of the ‘pink tax’? It’s real and cutting into women’s finances in a big way (30 December 2015)
Why you should always buy the men’s version of almost anything (22 December 2015)
So Who Is Responsible For The Gender Cost Gap? (23 December 2015)
Women Pay More for Everything From Birth to Death, Report Finds (23 December 2015)

‘Girl tax’: women call out being charged more by tradies, mechanics (23 March 2024)

The Gender Expense Gap is broader and more pervasive than simply retail pricing differentials, encompassing for example:

Men being required to pay more for a particular product or service than a woman for the same or similar product or service (i.e. gender discriminatory pricing). A broad range of examples can be identified including nightclub entry, membership of online dating sites, and insurance (health, life, auto, etc). Here is one such example.
Men being expected (via social convention) to meet the full cost of a given expense, e.g. a restaurant meal or a holiday, rather than the relevant expense/s being split 50/50 with their female companion
Men being forced, by law, to incur certain expenses that would either not be incurred by women, or would only rarely be incurred by them, e.g. payment of alimony or spousal support
Men being unable to avoid particular expenses (without a penalty being applied), that women in the same circumstances would or could avoid (e.g. in the US, women are less likely to meet their commitments to pay child support, and less likely to be penalised for doing so)
Men being denied compensation or financial support that would, in the case of women, offset costs incurred by them. Consider for example discounts or financial incentives or external funding support denied to men but available to women, e.g. scholarships and educational grants (example), sanitary products, superannuation top-up payments (here and here), maternity leave, and rebates or tax reductions for female-owned business start-ups.

How might we also, for example, assign a financial cost to factors such as workplace deaths (overwhelming affecting men), and the health impacts of reduced medical research/treatment (whereby the government spends a pittance on men/boys relative to women/girls).

This is a most challenging task as far as economic analysis goes, but nevertheless ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained’. A related reddit discussion thread can be found here.

Let’s look now at some of the specific factors that might be considered:

Courtship expenses and celebratory days

Men are still expected to subsidise most of the costs associated with courtship. The issue of who pays for dates is addressed in another blog post. One of the articles listed there is ‘Why women should never go halves on a date’ (27 November 2014).

Men are also expected to spend more on celebratory days, for e.g. birthdays, Mothers Day and Valentines Day, than are women.

‘I told my husband not to buy me a Christmas present – I’m fuming that he actually isn’t’ (21 December 2022)

Men, if you’re guilty of this, your wife will probably leave you (4 December 2023) Gee, wouldn’t it be interesting to read the husband’s version of events? But you never will, of course.

The Fathers Day spending deficit is addressed here, but some related articles include:

The Father’s Day spending gap: Why does mom always win? (10 May 2015)

Less spent of Father’s Day gifts than Mother’s Day gifts (6 September 2014)

Valentine’s Day spend twice as high for men: bank research (13 February 2017)

Valentine’s Day spending driven by single men in search for love (12 February 2015)

Valentines Day, by the numbers (14 February 2013)

Why Are Some Men Such Awkward Gift Givers? Let Them Explain (5 December 2016) USA. Talk about ‘look a gift horse in the mouth’! On that note see also “Men are also pretty useless at buying gifts in general”

Older men charged more for using Tinder’s premium service, Choice mystery shoppers find (12 August 2020) Five times more!

And on a lighter note, see If girls proposed to guys (Video)

Marriage and co-habitation

Although times are certainly changing, men typically remain the primary breadwinner in the family and are responsible for supporting most/all of the living expenses of their spouse and children. Men are also likely to bring considerably more assets into the marriage than are women. Woman however still typically remain in charge of making most of the decisions regarding the expenditure of household income.

WA de facto couples will be able to split super if relationship breaks down (25 October 2018) Men typically bring significantly more assets into a relationship, but the fact that they might take out more is “fundamentally unfair” … gynocentric much?

Is this the new normal? Women who live on a weekly ‘allowance’ from their husbands (7 May 2017)

New research reveals females control the household budget (27 November 2015)

‘I get a wife bonus — and I deserve it’ (29 May 2015)

Women who out-earn their husbands are also more likely to make money decisions for the family (17 March 2015)

New fathers must have same pay rights as mothers, says Nick Clegg, who vows to smash ‘Edwardian’ view on raising children (20 October 2014)

http://www.aifs.gov.au/institute/pubs/diversity/17spending.pdf

Men make more, women decide how to spend it (11 May 2012)

I declare the gender pay gap to be a truly dead and gone issue (27 April 2014)

The following quote addresses the average differential between earning and spending in male/female households:

“Men earn 61.5% of all income but only account for 25% of domestic spending. Men only spend 40% of what they earn after tax. In contrast women make up 38.5% of all income but control 75% of domestic spending, women on average spend 90% more money that they earn. Men are exploited as cash machines and even with spending on children accounted for women still spend more money on themselves than the combined spending for men and children.” (Source)

Divorce/Separation, incl. spousal/partner/child support and alimony

Sources addressing the issue of spousal maintenance/alimony can be found in this other blog post, but some examples are provided below.

Paying child-support for a non-biological child (5 March 2018)

Rosenblum: As times change, should alimony change, too? (25 March 2016)

Afeni Shakur And Whether Or Not Men Deserve Alimony (18 March 2016) USA

Group pushes male-dominated S.C. Legislature to change permanent alimony law (1 March 2016) USA

Report: NJ woman sued for writing ‘bum’ and ‘loser’ on ex-spouse’s alimony checks (19 December 2015) More on this case in this discussion thread and linked article

Breadwinning Women Are Driving Alimony Reform (18 November 2015) and related reddit discussion thread

Even though 37% of women earn more money than their husbands, only 3% of divorced men receive alimony (30 June 2015) Reddit discussion thread

Retired farmer must pay more in alimony than monthly income, Nebraska Supreme Court rules (27 June 2015)

Are Moms Less Likely Than Dads To Pay Child Support? (26 February 2015)

Divorced wife told to get a job and stop living off her ex-husband (23 February 2015)

Deadbeat moms? Should mothers be required to pay child support? (20 April 2014) and related reddit mensrights discussion thread

Jail Becomes Home for Husband Stuck With Lifetime Alimony (27 August 2013)

Woman sues ex-husband for a share of wealth he made years after they divorced (9 December 2014)

Why Do So Few Men Get Alimony? (20 November 2014) USA

Working woman in /r/legaladvice divorcing and is horrified that she has to give part-time-working ex-husband half her assets (15 November 2014)

Ex-wife of US oil baron to appeal $1 billion divorce award (13 November 2014)

Halle Berry’s Child-Support Fight: Female Breadwinners Can’t Have It Both Ways (20 October 2014)

Businessman is ordered to pay £28,500 to ex-girlfriend in landmark court ruling because he led her to believe he would look after her for life (17 October 2014)

Veteran chooses jail over giving his disability money to ex-wife (17 September 2014)

Alimony is broken – But let’s not fix it (1 September 2014)

Cost of education (esp. regarding the availability of financial support via government or university grants or discounts for example)

Critics Tell Young Men that Their Penises are NOT Golden (But They Are) (15 September 2022) by Janice Fiamengo. Recommended reading

Biden touts freeze on collections of $1.14m student loans (30 March 2021) USA. But let’s not say what percentage of those loans were to women, because that might seem like more #GenderEqualityWhenItSuits

According this female MRA posting on Twitter, 92% of all sex-specific scholarships are reserved for women (December 2020) USA

145 universities under federal investigation for sex discrimination against male students (27 May 2020) USA

Growing debate whether Title IX should help male students excluded by female-only programs (7 May 2020) USA

UN Women Australia MBA scholarship (May 2020) Each scholarship is worth $60,000 – available at the University of Sydney Business School. I have since written to relevant agencies about this matter, details regarding which can be found in this post.

Pell’s 6-Billion Dollar Gender Gap (1 March 2020)

Male Title IX activist expelled after “feminist witch-hunt” (12 November 2019) USA

Veteran of anti-male discrimination lawsuits SOUNDS OFF after study shows disproportionate female-only scholarships (26 August 2019)

ICRAR Visiting Fellowship for senior women in Astronomy (July 2019) Some previous fellowship recipients here.

Widespread sex discrimination found in college scholarship programs (18 May 2019) USA

Among 1,161 sex-specific scholarships, 91.6% were reserved for female students, with only 8.4% designated for male students.

Sydney University partners with UN Women Australia to offer women-only scholarships (March 2019)

Jordan Peterson, dozens of academics attack Ivy League anti-male bias (8 February 2019)

New data shows women now surpassing men in STEM fields (3 December 2018) USA. And then read this paper (2 March 2019)

The Science Ambassador Scholarship (December 2018) USA

Anti-male discrimination complaint gets UMN to change scholarship rules (2 November 2018)

Scholarship funding available for women working in the horticulture sector (28 September 2018)

Scholarships for Women in Male-Dominated Industries (12 September 2018)

Scholarships for ‘Board Ready’ Women in the Disability Sector (30 June 2017)

Sydney University defends new scholarship that favours men as ‘consistent with diversity’ (8 February 2017) Feminists lose it when a university faculty applies the same logic to attract more male students, and cry ‘sexism!’

Storm over Shami’s £500,000 to help girls get degrees … (4 January 2017) UK

Women in MBA Scholarship: 30 full rides. There are no men in biology or men in elementary education scholarships (23 September 2016) Australia

VCAT green light will let Ivanhoe Grammar School offer more places to girls (11 August 2016) Australia

“The decision [to escape provisions of sex discrimination legislation] will allow Ivanhoe Grammar to target female students in its advertising and to offer sweeteners to attract girls, including “scholarship and bursary assistance”.”

UN Women National Committee Australia MBA Scholarship (April 2016) Just one example – how many more like this?

There are four times as many scholarships for females as there are for males (28 February 2016) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

“It would be bad enough that men are continuously shamed for earning more than women, and told that because women get better grades in easier subjects, that women are more intelligent (SourceFed, 2014) or motivated (Lewin, 2006). However, women are also given disproportionate financial aid to attend college, even though they are now a sizeable majority of college students compared to men. While data is difficult to find, using the University of Oklahoma as an anecdotal example, in 2007 women received 78% of scholarships, and between the years of 2008 -2013 women received 89%, 77%, 68%, 94%, 92%, and 100% respectively (OU SLIS, 2013).

Government grants are another major source of funding for women wishing to attend college. There are numerous resources available created specifically for women (Scholarships for Women), but none specifically for men, unless you count athletic scholarships, which are a sticking point with Feminist activists who resent that female athletics lose money while male athletics make money for colleges (Bloomberg News, 2011). It seems fans aren’t interested in paying to watch female athletes perform at the level of a male high school junior varsity team. However, if you put athletics aside, and focus only on the resources available to help men obtain college degrees, those resources are sorely lacking, while money is being thrown at women who are wasting it on Liberal Arts degrees instead of STEM.” (Source)

Scholarship discrimination (7 December 2015) Reddit discussion thread

How the Australian Research Council promotes gender equality … by providing “at least two named Australian Laureate Fellowships targeted at outstanding women researchers” (2015) None for men

Verizon donation makes STEM summer camp for girls free of charge (20 November 2015)

Female postgraduate engineering students entitled to taxpayer-funded sponsorships worth £22,750, on the basis of gender alone (30 April 2015)

http://www.forbes.com/sites/ccap/2012/02/16/the-male-female-ratio-in-college/

http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/education/2005-10-19-male-college-cover_x.htm?csp=14

http://www.macleans.ca/general/why-do-women-still-deserve-special-scholarships/

Supporting women scholarships (February 2015) Australia. How many men-only scholarships are offered? My guess is ‘none’

4x as Many Scholarships for Women — a Disadvantage for Men? (27 February 2013)

Student Loans Help Women More than Men in Reaching Graduation (21 February 2013)

Insurance

Why Men Don’t Care About The Healthcare Debate (13 November 2017) USA

Men pay £170 a year more than women for car insurance despite EU gender rules (3 October 2017)

Men ‘pay £101 more’ for car insurance than women (13 January 2017) UK

Differences in insurance costs (29 June 2016) Reddit discussion thread

Men paying more for car insurance. Mensrights discussion thread and linked article (3 May 2015) Ireland

The benefits gap — a cursory analysis of US social security (OASI) and disability insurance (DI) (28 October 2014) A Reddit discussion thread

Canada’s Insurance Rates: Men vs. Women (17 January 2012)

Articles that address other gender-based expenditure/cost/revenue differentials

Norway broadens ‘Gender Equality’ debate to address disparities facing men and boys

The Grant Funding Deficit for Washington’s Boys and Men (15 September 2023)

Vodafone is paying women 500 extra a year for being women, possibly in violation of the 2009 law Fair work act in AU (15 March 2017)

The Travel Insurance Company Tackling Australia’s Gender Pay Gap (15 February 2017)

“Equal Pay is Not Enough”, says violent feminist ad for overpriced shoes complaining that women pay more for things (25 January 2017) Video with related Reddit discussion thread here.

About a company that operates lounges at conferences and to promote equality, men are charged more for refreshments based on the gender pay gap (18 January 2017) Reddit discussion thread with linked article.

Female scientists with young children offered extra $10,000 annually to stay on at Brisbane Institute (17 December 2016) Australia

Swiss parliament rejects paternity leave plea (27 April 2016)

Give Your Money To Women: The End Game of Capitalism (10 August 2015)

Why Do Women Have More Credit Card Debt Than Men? (28 June 2015)

“Bring it on” – Says Fitness center illegally charging men more for membership in the UK when complaints are raised (9 April 2015) Reddit mensrights discussion thread. And here’s how that story eventually played out.

Goldman Sachs 10,000 Women program Financial support for entrepreneurs (males need not apply)

You Should Know About: Feminist Perversion of Scientific Research. Athena SWAN – The go-to positive discrimination vehicle for feminists in STEM HE (14 November 2014)

Elsewhere in this blog you might be interested in:

On taxation and the ‘Female Economy’

Len & The Lamprey: The other side to the issue of financial abuse

When banks divert from banking to social engineering

Good manners versus chivalry

On women who are attracted to guys with partners

I would hardly be the first guy to have noticed that when I am out and about with my wife (and before that, my partner at the time) I attracted a level of obvious interest that rarely materialized when I went solo. In fact this phenomenon is so common as to generally be unworthy of comment. But I have never heard tell of the opposite situation, that is, women being hit on more often whilst they socialized in the company of a male partner.

Yes, ok, in some such situations it’s a matter of a woman flirting with a man because they feel comfortable approaching someone with a partner (and with no intention of taking things any further). In many other cases though it is undoubtedly a matter of the ‘thrill’ of trying to lure a man away from another woman, whether that be for a ‘one night stand’, or for a longer period of time. When such behaviour occurs it can be quite unpleasant for both the hapless target and his partner.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not holding myself up as a life-long beacon of propriety. What grates me about this behavior is that it occurs within a social context wherein feminists gloat about men being deficient in ways too numerous to mention (including having the morals of alley cats), whilst steadfastly ignoring any and all transgressions by women. Thus it’s not so much the moral laxity that irks me, it’s more the associated hypocrisy and denial that really ratchets up the ‘ewww!’ factor.

I came across an article that addresses this issue:

“The old proprieties surrounding marriage have been swept away by the aggressive ‘must-have’ attitude of an awful lot of modern women. The consensus, according to my friends, was that female emancipation – and the social, economic and sexual freedoms that have gone with it – have led to a liberal world in which nothing is sacred any more. Women are out for what they can get – and if that means another woman’s husband, then so be it. At a time when one in three marriages fails, the thinking seems to be that to ruin one or two more unions in your own pursuit of happiness won’t make much difference …

So, as the sanctity of the traditional nuclear family disintegrates before us, the worrying side-effect appears to be that many women today have few qualms about breaking up a marriage themselves …

What an irony that after decades fighting for parity with men, we women seem intent on turning our guns on ourselves.”

You can read more about this topic at:

Nadia Bokody: Real reason women are attracted to coupled-up men (22 January 2023) Notorious feminist journalist paints men as stupid and egocentric whilst putting the nicest possible spin on female behaviour

Sneaky trick married men are using to pick up on dating apps (15 September 2022) and I get hit on more by married men, both by Jana hocking (19 May 2022) My, well isn’t this a different perspective?

‘I sleep with married men – here’s how to spot a cheater’ (29 November 2021)

Self-professed serial mistress loves ‘thrill’ of sex with married men (7 October 2021)

Wellington woman shares how to have an affair cheating guide (news.com.au) (12 May 2021)

When men behave badly – A review (30 April 2021) Fascinating paper

The four words all women have used to get rid of unwanted advances (24 March 2021) But note reader MarkS’s apt comment: “Yeah, at least when you use “I have a boyfriend” blokes walk away. Far more often, creepy women reply to “I have a girlfriend” with “That’s ok, she doesn’t have to know. tee hee”. Somehow this is deemed acceptable behaviour, because women get a free pass on being creepy, and can claim victim status.”

What’s a girl to do with Jana: ‘Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I’m after your husband (29 November 2019). Single women unfairly targeted? Oh please, give me a break

Are Women and Men More Likely to “Punish” Male Cheaters? (20 October 2019)

Why we’re more likely to date someone who has an ex (9 November 2016)

This is why you’re attracted to married men (27 October 2016)

Why ‘I Have a Boyfriend’ Is Still the Best Way to Turn a Guy Down (5 May 2014)

A 2013 article (now removed from server) by a feminist author Alecia Lynn Eberhardt tells women how they should deal with approaches from men in nightclubs (“harassment” by “creeps” in her words). Then see the readers comments from the male perspective, plus further related discussion can be found here

The Shit Test Encyclopedia (14 December 2014) Word-search this doc to find references to “preselect” and “preselection”

‘Why women lose the dating game‘, by Bettina Arndt (22 April 2012)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-485097/Why-single-women-pursue-married-man.html#ixzz2sUzfiEuC

http://madamenoire.com/336086/gender-traitors-women-stand-solidarity-comes-cheating-men/

Don’t talk to me! No wait. Talk to me!

Those of you who have spent time in Asian countries might have noticed a lot of western women reading books in cafes and looking somewhat bored. In various web sites and discussion forums one may read their plaintive cries about feeling “invisible” (e.g. Japan/China) and having trouble finding guys who will give them the level of attention they feel is warranted.

It would appear that most western guys in Thailand, for example, have little time for western women. Instead they appear to prefer the company of more feminine, laidback (and yes, often more attractive) Thai ladies. And cynics note that I am referring to Thai ladies in general, and not simply bar-girls.

I even read a post the other day where a female expat stated that she was tired of western men in Thailand “disrespecting” western women in the way they pointedly ignore them. Tragic, just tragic.

In my blog post ‘I thought women were meant to be more empathetic‘ I talk about the issue of western women in Thailand flaunting local dress standards. Is this ‘look at me! look at me!’ behaviour in response to the ‘attention deficit mode’ that many western women appear to descend into within days of arrival in Asia? Or is it simply a reflection of a broader attitude of ‘my need to indulge myself trumps your right to have local social mores respected’?

Moving across to India, read about ‘The woman who says that it’s not only men who like to look‘ (24 August 2016)

Why don’t Western men in Asian countries lift their game and jump at the opportunity of approaching western women? Oh wait, they have already tried that back home and were rewarded with looks of disdain or contempt – or even accused of harassment. I can see this is going to be a tough sell.

So what then, you might ask, is the current situation in western countries such as USA, Canada, the UK, and Australia?

Well in the West men are confused, for they are routinely dragged over the coals for alternately either paying too much attention to women, or not enough. Or about the right amount but they are doing it wrong. Oh, and the goalposts regarding the ‘right’ way are continuously being moved.

On that first point, readers would be aware of the surfeit of publicity regarding the unwanted looks and attention that women attract from men, and how such behaviour threatens and disgusts them (example here).

And then every now and then there is an incident that serves as a lightning rod and focus for demands for action. Let’s look at the example of THAT infamous New York street harassment video …

Why I’m Not Buying That New York City Street Harassment Video (30 October 2014)
New York Times: Should Black And Hispanic Men Be Banned From Chatting Up White Feminist Women? (3 November 2014)
Dear Sydney men, you’re no New Gawkers — you’re just very spoiled (arrogant and rude too!) (4 November 2014) Article is rubbish but some interesting comments
Keeping It Topical: That Catcalling Video (5 November 2014)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwdoXbxFwuY and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75aX9mlipiY&feature=youtu.be (See also http://i.imgur.com/BXvmuYa.png) Both videos feature guys being ‘harassed’ as they walk the streets)
Christina Hoff Summers on ‘What the Catcalling video gets wrong‘ (10 November 2014)
Many months later Australian feminists were still trying to milk this video in their never-ending quest to demonize men (17 March 2015). The video was cited again in this December 2016 article on catcalling. And again in this June 2017 article in The Conversation.

In February 2017 another fake street harassment video emerged … ‘Video of raging female cyclist lashing out at van full of catcalling builders ‘revealed as FAKE’ as company pledges to launch internal probe’

In November 2017 another such fake street harassment video emerged … “Woman attacks man with her breasts for ‘staring at her’”

In early December 2018 an article appeared entitled ‘Is Australia sexist? Documentary asks if men and women are equal in the 21st century‘ – and of course there’s a video of Aussie guys looking at, and calling out to, Aussie women. Bettina Arndt had earlier written an article about the set-up that was the original ‘study’ in The Australian. Now take a look at this video critique of the SBS program.

I’d suggest now reading the two articles below, which set the scene quite well for the additional sources that follow:

The Sexodus, Part 1: The men giving up on women and checking out of society (4 December 2014) with related discussion thread here, and The Sexodus, Part 2: Dishonest Feminist panics leave male sexuality in crisis (9 December 2014) … and here is a link to a related YouTube video

And now feel free to peruse these further sources regarding the increasingly fraught issue of public interaction between the genders:

‘Not OK’: Fitness influencer Laura Henshaw calls out ‘icky’ car act (7 August 2024)

Modern women are upset because men keep avoiding them at work (2 August 2024) Video (see also the viewer’s written comments)

I raised my son Winston as a feminist. It breaks my heart that today’s young women treat him as toxic for just being male – while men are cancelled and belittled (1 August 2024)

Are many/most men worried concerning communicating with their wives/partners? (26 July 2024) Video

Expat reveals why dating in Australia is so different (22 July 2024)

‘Who approved this?’: Dating app Bumble cops backlash over new billboards (14 May 2024) Expecting women to make the move is downright unacceptable, because …

New Zealand woman slams Aussie dating culture (27 April 2024) Entitled? Not much

‘You need to start talking about it’: Erin Molan calls on Australian men to speak up about domestic violence (26 April 2024)

British expat’s ‘problem’ with Aussie men (25 February 2024)

Harry Connick Jr’s daughters reveal the problem with Aussie men (11 February 2024)

Man’s gym act exposes ‘insane’ problem women face while working out (19 January 2024)

Manchester bar reveals set of quirky rules that bans men from approaching women – and advises female customers to ‘lift their chin and ignore’ anyone who tries to chat them up (30 November 2023)

Response to video of man ‘admiring’ woman reveals wider issue (27 November 2023) A man doesn’t even need to speak to be of concern. Utterly ridiculous

Horrifyingly common act against women exposed by text trend (26 October 2023) OK, so this one isn’t about talking – it’s about texting. But your face will be in your palm in 3-2-1. Say anything bad about women and you’re not just a misogynist – you’re frightening! Nothing even vaguely uncomplimentary is said about women … presumably perfect already.

(Source of the study extract noted above)

Street harassment: A missing piece in measuring women’s public safety (26 February 2024)

What women define as sexual harassment or catcalling is often biased, studies show (13 October 2023) Reddit MensRights discussion thread

It’s over. I got expelled for approaching girls (14 October 2023) Video

Woman shares clever reverse psychology trick to get guys to leave you alone in bars (21 July 2023) USA

Commuters send 1500 alerts to sex crime, abuse service (11 July 2023)

Woman’s note to ‘cute’ plane guy goes viral (4 July 2023) “The bold flier told her followers that the sky-high story was proof that people should go after what they want”. No, not “people” … just women.

‘He just kept going’ – why you might snap back, freeze or ignore street harassment (16 June 2023)

Sad reason women are wearing a baggy T-shirt on public transport (24 May 2023)

A man spoke to a woman in a car park. The horror. The horror (30 March 2023) Video

Men in Scotland who loudly boast about sexual conquests in public could face jail (8 March 2023)

A colleague at work (27m) of 1 year refuses to socialise with me (24f) or any of the women in our office (11 February 2023) Reddit ‘relationship advice’ discussion thread – good reader comments! Plus here is a link to a related Twitter discussion thread.

The toxic women of gym TikTok (7 February 2023)

Twitter thread concerning a girl attending a gym who claims some fellow is watching her. Read the thread and you’ll note that the two main female characters featured in it – complaining about being harassed/objectified – both have OnlyFans accounts #FacePalm. Here’s the original MSM item (23 January 2023).

Assessing #MeToo, Five years on (28 November 2022)

Women gets angry when man speaks to her in the queue for the supermarket checkout (25 September 2022) Video

Half of single men avoid interacting with women out of fear of being seen as ‘creepy’ (28 September 2022)

What guy wouldn’t want it? (2022) Journal of Social Issues. Recommended reading

Brisbane women stunned by ‘persistent’ US men while travelling (15 September 2022) Men criticized for approaching too much and not enough – all in the one article

Why It’s Never a Good Idea to Demonize The Consumer (13 September 2022)

‘Never OK’: Fury at ‘disgusting’ response to supermarket assault (26 August 2022) Another bogus video to stir the anti-male pot and generate traffic to her social media site/s? Time will tell

Sydney nightclub bans staring without getting prior ‘verbal consent’ (25 August 2022)

Watch Woman Falsely Accuses Blind Surfer Pete Gustin Of Staring At Her In The Gym, Video Goes Viral (15 August 2022) OK, so it’s about looking, not talking

Men who sexually harass women in the street with unwanted sexual comments could face up to two years in jail under proposed new offence (13 August 2022) UK and Blind man kicked out of a gym for ‘staring’ at a woman (20 June 2023)

Woman left shaken after being chased by man during her run (10 August 2022)

Aussie men seriously lack game compared to American men (4 August 2022) And here’s one for the ‘men should talk to women’ camp. But only if they’re cool.

Tory leadership: Liz Truss promises new offence of street harassment (28 July 2022)

Creepy way man got woman’s number off her dog’s collar (8 June 2022) Again, only creepy when a man does this. Especially a poor/unattractive man.

Catcalls, homophobia and racism: we studied why people (and especially men) engage in street harassment (2 June 2022)

Male customer’s surprise reaction after waitress makes move on him (28 May 2022) Contrast this with the 19 March article listed below

Woman admits she regrets her ‘d**k magnet’ tattoo (18 May 2022)

Woman kicks sand in man’s face after ‘invasive’ beach act (11 April 2022)

Woman orders coffee at Starbucks and finds creepy secret note on the cup from barista (19 March 2022)

Instagram ‘socialite’ and OnlyFans star Casie Caldwell drunkenly spat on police (12 March 2022)

Former Ms Great Britain reveals she can’t get a date (27 February 2022) She never gets chatted up. 100 dates were unfruitful. It’s all men’s fault.

Honey Badger Radio: Why Men Won’t Approach Women & What We Need To Do About It (18 January 2022)

The yin of being looked at and the yang of looking. — The Centre for Male Psychology (2 September 2021)

Is Flirting the Next Victim of Millennials’ Metaphorical Murder Spree? | Opinion (newsweek.com) (29 June 2021)

The four words all women have used to get rid of unwanted advances (24 March 2021)

6 Reasons men need to stop making the first move in dating (7 March 2021)

The pandemic of male loneliness (24 February 2021)

Men going their own way: the rise of a toxic male separatist movement (26 August 2020) You’d think they’d be happy if men went away, but nah. Funny thing that.

Are masks giving men a license to leer? Women report a rise in ‘aggressive eye contact’ (28 July 2020)

Police issue warrant for Louisiana woman, 29, who ‘shot her boyfriend because he refused to argue with her’, leaving him in critical condition (20 July 2020)

Women are fun (July 2020) Video

‘Shy and awkward’ student, 19, who googled ‘how to make a friend’ assaults schoolgirl, 17 (11 October 2019)

Men: Before you tell a joke/give advice/pay a compliment. A twitter stream from a woman with advice for men (4 September 2019)

Danish women prefer wolf-whistles to feminism (11 May 2019)

The Victorian Government (Australia) has issued a video highlighting the horror of women receiving unwanted attention on public transport, and – surprise surprise – calling on men to step in and deal with other men (9 April 2019). ‘Independent Man’ responds to this rather well with his own video.

Of course governments never step in and ask women to deal with other women who transgress one ‘rule’ or another, err like sexually abusing students for example. Because that would be hateful or misogynistic or something bad. Or something.

Unsafe in the City – A Tale of Five Cities, by Plan International (October 2018) This pro-feminist ‘study’ unsurprisingly completely ignores not just all the people who manage to remain safe in the city, but also both male victimisation and female violence.

Young woman was handed a note on the train (October 2018) Video

Flight etiquette: I broke the one rule of long-haul flying (5 September 2018) But of course the guy in the plane seat next to you wants to get to know you

#MeToo Backlash In Corporate Canada Sees Women Locked Out (2 August 2018)

Judge approves lawsuit against Mizzou for punishing student who asked woman on a date (17 July 2018) USA

Men, take heed from the Victorians: don’t hound women in public (31 May 2018) Clearly no need to consider inappropriate behaviour by women, or the steps needed to address this.

Confusing sexual harassment with flirting hurts women (14 November 2017) by Cathy Young

Op-Ed: Is ‘Weinsteining’ getting out of hand? (1 November 2017) by Cathy Young

Man jailed for creepily staring at Glasgow pharmacy assistant through window (27 October 2017) UK

Be sure not to initiate a conversation with a woman you don’t know on the bus (13 July 2017)

In the U.K, women more than men perceive wolf-whistling as a compliment (7 July 2017)

Trump did to Merkel what men do to women all the time, by Jessica Valenti (March 2017)

Australian Bar Prohibits Men From Approaching Women, Must Speak ‘As They Would to Their Mother’ (23 February 2017)

Sexless in Silicon Valley: why nobody’s getting laid in America’s tech hub (19 January 2017) Not much sex or dating taking place and, of course, the blame is placed at the feet of socially inept men because …

Harassment of women by men at Summernats cannot be excused or ignored, by Clementine Ford (16 January 2017) Australia. This article includes the statement:

“Why are the events like the mass groping at Cologne used as an example of how immigrant men pose a threat to “our women”, yet white Australian men acting in a similar fashion at a car show is dismissed as “boys being boys”?”

And this with no evidence provided – aside from two vague anecdotal accounts – that any man laid a hand on a woman at Summernats 2017. No mention, for example, of any actual police reports. In fact, I have been advised that in the entire 30 year history of Summernats there have been only two reported sexual assaults. And yet this being, allegedly, in a “similar fashion” to the outrage that occurred on NYE in Cologne? Talk about a reach!

These two pictures were both taken at Summernats, guess which one featured in Clementine’s article?

Longing for the male gaze (21 September 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here.

I’m a feminist who’s attracted to ‘manly men’ (13 September 2016)

Lads! Britain needs you to do your duty and get flirting (24 August 2016) UK

Reader’s Comment: Nottinghamshire men must stop looking at women (17 July 2016)

A life time of leers (5 June 2016) Reddit discussion thread with linked article

Where Did All The Chat Up Lines Go? Why We Miss Them… (27 November 2015)

“The days when men could be bothered to try and muster any sort of conversational gambit are gone” (6 December 2015) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

Model has ribs removed to transform into real-life Jessica Rabbit (27 November 2015)

Black Man Asks Woman For Phone Number In Oakland, She Posts Flyer About It And Calls Cops (19 October 2015)

Disgusted father tells woman on train to sit down (24 February 2012) Video Canada

Barrister names and shames senior lawyer who sent her a ‘sexist’ LinkedIn message (8 September 2015) Quite barking mad. And here is some ever-articulate commentary on the matter from ‘The Other McCain‘ (12 September 2015)

Chrissie Hynde was right about rape. Now feminists want to silence her (31 August 2015)

‘Ghosted’ by my boyfriend: After four years together he left and I never heard from him again (28 August 2015) Stick around after break-up (creepy stalker) or move on and start a clean page (ghoster/thoughtless cad)

Feminists, and how to avoid them (12 August 2015)

Young women need to ‘tone down’…really? (1 August 2015) See readers comments

“In honesty, I didn’t make my sign”: SlutWalk revisited (Edmonton edition) (12 August 2015)

Guardian Author Who Called for End of Catcalling now Regrets she is not Catcalled (21 July 2015)

OK Cupid Data on Sex, Desirability, and Age (3 July 2015)

Finding a boyfriend cured my crippling loneliness, but left me feeling a bad feminist (23 June 2015) and related reddit mensrights discussion thread

The trials and tribulations of a token pretty girl (28 December 2014) and related reddit menrights discussion thread

Alex from Target: The other side of fame (12 November 2014) Objectified and harassed, but wait! How can this be? (Alex is a boy)

She explains why so many women don’t say ‘Hello.’ The reason is absolutely chilling (1 November 2014)

Rise of the Feminist Tinder-Creep-Busting Web Vigilante (27 October 2014) Read those comments and feel the frustration and anger. Next stop MGTOW

Boycott college women while in college (24 October 2014)

HuffPo and Salon slut-shame men (14 October 2014)

Vancouver men, please stop harassing women (12 October 2014)

On Not Approaching Women At All (9 September 2014)

Fallout from campus sexual assault hysteria: College men now suspicious of women (22 August 2014)

Read transcript of an item on a US TV show entitled ‘Libs want men to stop looking at women‘

Feminism versus Miley Cyrus (20 April 2014)

Getting over feeling invisible after 50 (23 December 2013)

Breast enlargement remains the most popular procedure (UK) and in the United States too (2013). In fact if you want a good chuckle then google on ‘feminism and breast augmentation’ and see the fur fly as feminists who have had their chests packed with silicon try to rationalise their decision (“I did it for myself, really”). Of course you did.

See the readers comment by ‘Okrahead’ about the spandex ‘lady’ in the gym in this article

Learn how approaching women in a nightclub is “harassment” perpetrated by “creeps”. Seriously guys, why bother? Interesting related discussion can be found here

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2602965/Men-try-kiss-10-minutes-meeting-Meet-tattooed-stunner-whos-popular-date-OKCupid-having-choice-men-ruining-love-life.html

In-depth: How We Waded Into The Sexual Harassment Quagmire — And How to Wade Out: One Man’s View (11 December 2011) Recommended reading from a big-picture viewpoint

The new math of campus (5 February 2010) Aw gee, not enough guys to go around on campus … and that was 2010 and there’s even less guys on campus now! ROTFL! Take a bow, feminism

And check this out too: http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/topless-women-protestors-surprised-upset-as-men-show-up-with-cameras/story-e6frfku0-1225850121971

Read article entitled “Men here, they don’t even turn their head to look at you.” Awww. Gee, I wonder why this would happen … maybe because of attitudes like those expressed by the wimmin quoted below …

And here we read that British women don’t want to look at themselves in the mirror

Conclusion

Men and women are individuals whose position with regards to interacting with other individuals is influenced by many variables including age, relationship status, sexual orientation, cultural background, etc. There is no ‘one size fits all’.

Men are criticized both for approaching women, and for not approaching women. Some women live for male attention, others want none, with the remainder happy to engage at the times, and in the manner, of their choosing. Oh, and an individual woman’s position may change on a daily basis and/or depending upon the perceived attractiveness of the male who approaches her.

As women do not hold up signs advising of their own particular preferences, even well-meaning men – who comprise the overwhelming majority – are in a constant state of uncertainty, unease and frustration. Maybe if all women could organise themselves onto the same page, and circulate universal guidelines, things might be different. But we all know that’s not going to happen.

Feminists stoking the fire of misunderstanding and paranoia between the genders sure doesn’t help things, and only serves to propel ever more men towards a MGTOW lifestyle.

Elsewhere in this blog you might be interested in reading:

Girls showing their bits = empowerment? patriarchal exploitation? self-indulgence? other?
The ‘Marriage Strike’ and MGTOW
On privilege, respect, and entitlement
Fembots may prove to be a game changer
Harassment and discrimination in business and the workplace: Surprise, surprise, it goes both ways
When men have a daughter (another tale of male-blaming and silencing)

The ‘Marriage Strike’ and MGTOW

Look at this July 2024 article in which feminists dump on the perceived inadequacy of men, and how they’re being routinely cheated out of that which they feel they deserve. Don’t hold your breath waiting for the corresponding article in which men list how women are doing. It’s not going to happen.

Oh, if only I could get a dollar each time I heard a woman say “where have all the nice guys gone!?” (here’s one such offering). One may not, however, mention the corresponding query “where have all the nice girls gone” because that would be so terribly misogynistic.

Well, some clever guys made their way to Asia or to other parts of the world where the influence of feminism is less pervasive. Many others are waking up and smelling the coffee with respect to what a bad deal marriage can be for men. As a consequence a large and steadily increasing number of men are choosing not to get married, a phenomenon some have labelled ‘The Marriage Strike’.

Other men are taking it a step further and opting not to enter into ANY significant ongoing relationships with women. This latter group are referred to as ‘Men going their own way’ or MGTOW, which is discussed in this video.

A google search on the term ‘marriage strike’ produced many results, including these:

http://www.justfourguys.com/women-start-marriage-strike-men-complete-it/

http://www.avoiceformen.com/sexual-politics/marriage/why-are-men-going-their-own-way-when-it-comes-to-relationships/

http://drhelen.blogspot.com.au/2010/06/what-hell-is-happening-to-30-something.html

Many would have you believe that this phenomenon reflects men’s unwillingness to commit and accept responsibility to a union of equals. In fact the thread running through all feminists articles on the subject (and most MSM articles too) is that women are dateless or single wholly because of one or more named deficiencies on the part of men (example). There is rarely even the glimmer of a suggestion that some responsibility rests with women themselves.

Of course there are some men who have issues, but for most the decision not to marry is one of pragmatism. It is the outcome of a rational cost/benefit analysis by men that weighs up all the things they might (or will) lose through marriage, versus those things that they will (or are likely to) gain. The institution of marriage has now swung so far, in terms of the respective rights and responsibilities of men and women, that for men there is unfortunately now only one logical choice.

My own mother is in her 90’s and remains fiercely independent, and still very much sound of mind. Just in her circle of friends and family she has heard plenty of horror stories about guys being divorce-raped by selfish manipulative women. And her take on it? She says that if she was a young guy nowadays then there would be no way to get her to the altar as the odds are so very much stacked against them.

Read the articles below and see if you can seriously blame men for walking away from the institution of marriage. I despair at the number of women that I encounter whose primary, if not sole, focus is on what they can get from a relationship. I strain to see evidence of any serious thought being given to the question of “what I can contribute to this union to ensure it remains strong and fairly balanced?” It’s almost as if their sense of entitlement is so overwhelming that they believe that merely the pleasure of their company should suffice (refer this tweet for example).

Start with these four nuggets of harpy wisdom:

Psychologist receiving hate mail after ‘lonely, single men’ report (15 August 2022)

Celibate, Misogynist and Proud —This Is What Contemporary Feminism Has Done to Men (9 October 2016) Be sure to scan the readers comments. See also related Reddit discussion thread here.

Want to get yourself a man? Then shut up (20 January 2016) Strong women can’t get a man because of the unrealistic/unreasonable/inappropriate expectations/behaviour of men (and definitely not because “strong” is fem-speak for ill-mannered, controlling and selfish)

Why women need to start asking men out … because men have no balls (9 September 2014) In this piece an entitled princess pens an article that reads like a recruitment brochure to the MGTOW lifestyle … and be sure to read the comments that follow it.

And then these three articles written from a men’s perspective:

Most women don’t deserve a good man (15 March 2014)

Sad sluts are sad that no one wants to marry them (29 September 2015)

Women Want to Know Why Men Don’t Want to Marry Anymore…Allow Me – RedState (22 June 2021)

Leaving aside remnant neanderthals, most men today understand and readily concur with the idea of ‘give and take’ within a relationship. But we do have a problem with partners who take, take, take.

Of course once upon a time married men were accorded a higher social status than unmarried men, and marriage was once the only way decent men experienced a viable sex life. But not now.

Ok, so what tangible benefits does marriage confer on a man today?

A family? Assuming a man can afford a family AND marries a woman young enough to conceive, many resist having children. And at the end of the day, most men are all-too-aware that the prevailing legal system can and does remove a husband’s access to his kids with frightening ease and frequency.

A carer and housekeeper? Well this one is no deal-breaker as most guys are willing to pitch in and do their share. Indeed, am I alone in having encountered more than a few households where the husband does most of the house-work, as well as holding down a full-time job? Indeed many women now not only lack domestic skills (thanks to all those progressive mummies and daddies) but are also unwilling to countenance such tasks (example re: cooking).

Achieving financial security through building family wealth? OK, there are now plenty of households where husband and wife both work and contribute towards shared assets such as a house. All this can be to no avail however should a wife become restless and walk away, often availing herself of the often hugely disproportionate benefits conferred by a gynocentric legal system.

Consider also the many households where a wife chooses not to engage in paid work, does little or no housework, whilst profligately spending her husband’s income … only to then later financially destroy him upon initiating her no-fault divorce. Remember that men still generally take significantly more assets into a marriage than do women. Women are more likely to bring debt to the table – ‘student debt‘ for example. Oh, and remember that most divorces are initiated by women.

A similar proposition, though expressed in a somewhat more strident manner, was elucidated in this Return of Kings article.

This post, ‘The Marriage Strike and MGTOW‘, has attracted more hits that any other page in this blog. And then I learnt that for the first time in Google history, as many people are searching on the term ‘MGTOW’ as are searching on the term ‘patriarchy’:

Refer links to some interesting, challenging (and some face-palm worthy) articles/videos below:

Men are refusing to attend dating events (1 September 2024) Video

Aussie escort reveals unexpected cost of living sex trend (27 August 2024)

Housing Crisis: Australia forecast to have a 260,000 new home shortfall by mid-2029 (22 July 2024) And now the falling birth-rate is due to the housing shortage #FacePalm

China’s birthrate plummets as ‘illegal’ pregnancy tests spark outrage (22 July 2024) “Censorship of politically undesirable ideas is the easy first step” … but that’s only a negative when the ideas thus targeted are favored by the feminist hegemony.

Lawyers say ‘bank of mum and dad’ driving rise in ‘prenup’ requests (5 June 2024)

Tokyo’s local government will launch a dating app to try and boost Japan’s falling birth rate (4 June 2024) LOL, yes a new dating app will make all the difference in the world #FacePalm

‘Really low for Australian history’: Our fertility rate is dropping steadily amid cost of living crisis (23 April 2024) This article blames the rising cost of living

Would you be happy as a long-term single? The answer may depend on your attachment style (23 April 2024) Psycho-babble, and ignores the issue of gender

Women are sharing the reason they don’t want to have children (1 April 2024)

Why aren’t British women having babies any more? (The Times, 29 March 2024)

Explosion Of Leftover, Single And Childless Women Is Taking The West By Storm (5 March 2024) Video

In South Korea, world’s lowest fertility rate plunges again in 2023 (29 February 2024) And again, not a whisper about what the men are thinking or doing, and how much of a bearing that has on birth rates.

Husband’s ‘evil’ act exposes why women are leaving marriages (10 January 2024) And as usual, exactly 0% of responsibility for the ‘problem’ is attributed by the MSM to the actions & attitudes of women. Do you think this might be part of the problem?

New dating trends revealed in Bumble’s 2024 annual report (16 November 2023) Of course women dating less has nothing to do with any deficiency on their part. It’s because men don’t exhibit the deep & profound understanding of political and social issues. Like women do

Parliament votes for more fatherless children, by Bettina Arndt (21 October 2023)

Don’t mention the war!, by Bettina Arndt (30 September 2023)

The Dating Pool Drop-outs (September 2023) Article by a female journalist who pretended to be a guy in dating apps, and related discussions

Fewer and less expensive weddings hurting China’s massive marriage industry (19 September 2023) Just don’t mention the ‘M’ word (‘men waking up’)

Calls for courts to better acknowledge family violence in property settlement cases (18 September 2023) Australia. And the existence of family violence will be proven how exactly?

Family violence victims win in legal overhaul of property disputes (17 September 2023) “Victims of domestic violence” – as defined/determined by who?

I ask men to show me their bank balance on the first date because I only want to go out with wealthy guys – I need to know if I’m wasting my time (31 August 2023) USA

The collapse of the British family (21 August 2034)

Woman offers a $7k referral bonus to anyone who finds her a husband (12 July 2023)

Wedding industry impacted as Australians cut back on spending (6 July 2023) Yes, let’s talk about anything other than what men think

Expert hits back at anti-vaxxers for hijacking birth data for ‘faux science’ (20 June 2023) This article actually mentions gender equality as a relevant factor, but implying that it’s putting women off marriage/parenthood

Charlotte Ree on ‘two conditions’ her husband set before marriage (10 June 2023) Now swap the genders – she wouldn’t be controlling. She would be brave and fair and responsible.

She likes humbling men (May 2023) Video. Red flag is an understatement

Dry dating: Gen Z increasingly going sober on first dates (8 May 2023) One possible factor here are concerns real instances and/or false accusations of sexual assault

Why young men are giving up (10 April 2023) Video

Why more women than ever are cheating on their husbands (13 March 2023)

Disturbing reason why six in 10 young men are single (24 February 2023) And of course the reason has to centre upon one or more alleged weakness or deficiencies on the part of young men.

I’m a psychologist and these are 13 reasons why people DON’T want to get married anymore (23 January 2023) Gee, this is limited in its reach with regards to the male perspective.

Why men refuse to marry western women and go abroad for love (2022) USA video

Woman says she assumes dates are cancelled if not confirmed (26 November 2022)

‘I’m quiet quitting men and I’m not even sorry about it’ (10 November 2022) Be my guest

ABS reveals how Covid-19 pandemic impacted weddings and divorces last year (10 November 2022)

Earth to Poilievre: MGTOW Have Good Reason, and Every Right, to Avoid Women (10 October 2022)

Guys know that the rise in lonely single men in turn renders more women single too right? (August 2022) A female perspective. As usual there’s an enormous chasm between what they say and what they do IRL.

Women Could Sue Person Who Got Them Pregnant Under New Proposal (21 July 2022) USA

Woman swears off dating men due to frustrating trend (15 July 2022) Stop it! You’re going to make me cry

Woman goes to singles mixer—only women show up, sparking debate (26 June 2022)

Dating expert reveals the five words that send single men running (16 June 2022)

‘High maintenance’ is a red flag on dating apps. Women are still expected to shrink themselves (2 May 2022)

Divorces surge by almost 50% as ‘no fault’ law comes in, fueling fears the rule change has made marriage splits easier (14 April 2022)

‘Hollywood Hills Wife’ reveals her tips for attracting and marrying wealthy men (26 March 2022)

Men are blinded by great sex (25 March 2022) USA video

‘We get the raw deal out of almost everything’: a quarter of young Australians are pessimistic about having kids (21 February 2022) And yet another article that identifies the key issues (#sarcasm) behind lack of marriage/parenthood as being safe tame factors like Covid, the housing market, employment. Anything but the real elephant in the room issues, because talking about *those* things would very quickly rile the woke/feminist set. Hey you, stay away from our narrative!

Men get a raw deal in divorce cases … according to the women they are splitting from (20 February 2022)

Americans less likely to have sex, partner up and get married than ever (14 February 2022)

Women Share Pictures Of Before And AFTER Meeting Their Partners, They’re STARK Comparisons – YouTube (7 July 2021) Video

Cheating wife caught hiding in ceiling by raging husband after romping with toy boy in ‘love hotel’ (4 December 2020) The reward you get for working away on an oil rig. But adultery is a crime there – wow – whereas here she would score a job as a social media ‘influencer’.

Lesbian couples are twice as likely to divorce as married gay men, ONS data reveals as overall rates see largest rise in 50 years (18 November 2020)

Women are starting to worry, they see men leaving the game (12 November 2020) Video by ‘Better Bachelor’

The US divorce rate has hit a 50 year low (10 November 2020) Now let’s see – would that happen to be because the marriage rate is at a similar low? Hmm

Woke women are killing marriage and dating (10 November 2020)

Millions of men no longer want to get married, and you can thank the government for that (2 November 2020) USA

Finnish man ordered by court to pay alimony for a child resulting from his wife cheating with another man (19 October 2020)

‘We’re in deep strife’: Fertility wipe-out set to derail COVID-19 recovery (25 September 2020) Australia. It’s just extraordinary how the media routinely identifies tangential issues – in this case Covid-19 – upon which to assign ‘blame’ for the steep decline to marriage & parenthood. Anything is fair game, as long as it doesn’t upset the feminist/SJW crew. Oh, and here is the next monthly installment of same.

MGTOW: Men don’t need women? (28 August 2020) YouTube video by Diana Davison

Late 30’s feminist gets dumped repeatedly: “Men are so insecure she claims!” (24 June 2020) Good USA video

U.S. births fall to lowest level in 35 years (20 May 2020)

U.S. marriage rate plunges to lowest level on record (29 April 2020)

Is there a man drought in Australia? An Investigation (17 April 2020) Instead of addressing the actual reasons underpinning male reluctance to attach, feminist journos delight in throwing petrol on the fire with ‘wisdom’ like this:

“The perception of scarcity, frontier mentality and entrenched patriarchy has led to a wild proliferation of garbage behaviours among our menfolk”

Victim culture hits the courts: Woman gets paid for career she might have had, but gave up for marriage and kids (29 February 2020)

Young women at Griffith University (Australia) get tips about what to expect/demand in a special dating guide. (February 2020) Gee, hope they enjoy the company of cats.

He said ‘yes’! Why aren’t more women proposing to their boyfriends? (27 December 2019) “Benevolent sexism” is the magic ingredient that’s apparently holding men back from offering the ring. Of course it had to involve some kind of failing on the part of men. Of course it did. That many people take such a narrow view of the issue continues to astound me.

The weakened signal hits home (10 September 2019) by Dalrock

Fewer People Are Getting Married. The Reason Why Is Stunning, According to Science | Inc.com (7 September 2019) Yes, that’s right, it’s men fault. Of course it is!

Why are millenial women cheating more than men? (April 2019)

“Kelly was similarly unrepentant. “Part of me did it as a little bit of misandry,” she says. “Like, I can’t feel all that guilty because I didn’t really trust or respect men deeply enough anyway.””

The sex revolution of my youth wasn’t so great. Maybe today’s celibacy is a sign of progress (7 April 2019) Feminist woman gets it completely wrong again, femsplaining that young men steering away from sex and relationships is all about ‘incels’ resenting independent women. Well, apparently.

54-year-old feminist angry at dating agency for not finding her a rich husband (30 March 2019) Just throwing this article in for a chuckle

Marriage is still the main way for women to get rich: study (21 February 2019)

Speed dating event cancelled due to lack of men (12 February 2019)

Most Americans consider debt a dating deal-breaker (6 February 2019) Then most Americans are coming to their senses

If we seriously want men to marry and become fathers, let’s repeal no-fault divorce (13 January 2019)

The Sex Recession, by Kate Julian (14 November 2018)

The Breaking Point: Why Do Women Initiate Divorce More Than Men? (23 July 2018) States that 90% of all divorces are initiated by college-educated women

If we seriously want men to marry and become fathers, let’s repeal no-fault divorce (17 June 2018)

Rise of the bromance is bad for women, could become ‘genuine lifestyle relationship’: study (12 October 2017)

I’ve Gotten Blown Off By Men So Much Lately That I’m Literally Questioning Everything (October 2017) Author displays total absence of understanding that men have been treated this way since forever (well before the advent of dating apps!) Welcome to our world darling. Reader’s comments scathing but accurate.

Why are good men so hard to find? (23 September 2017) Canada. Author concludes that both men and women need to “get their act together”, but in ways she doesn’t clearly spell out.

Pension pot gold diggers: Middle aged women who marry a second time are mainly motivated by money (19 September 2017) UK

‘Cheap sex’ is making men give up on marriage (2 September 2017) USA. Men being immature, men wallowing in porn. Has to be men’s fault. Just has to be.

Explaining “MGTOW”: What this men’s rights trend is all about (16 May 2017) Some good reader’s comments

Childish men are to blame for women having kids late in life (13 May 2017)

Step up so they don’t have to (Part 1), by Dalrock (10 May 2017) An interesting Christian perspective on the contemporary male’s choice to avoid marriage. And whilst we consider the Christian perspective, perhaps view this video entitled ‘Young Women shouldn’t settle’, about what men versus women expect from their marriage partner.

Response to Jordan Peterson’s comments on MGTOW, by Karen Straughan (24 April 2017) Video

I’ll tell you where all the good men have gone (13 April 2017) Good overview of the issue

Older women, the expired lottery tickets – MGTOW (5 April 2017) Video

To fix marriage, we need to fix divorce (31 March 2017)

How couples are easily spending $150k on the modern Aussie dream wedding (17 February 2017)

Denying the feminist rebellion by Dalrock (9 February 2017) Recommended reading.

Most men are not afraid of commitment (19 January 2017)

Divorcees take five years to recover financially (13 December 2016) Interesting how the writer elects to profile a woman in this article … no sympathy for men?

Why Do These Straight Men Want Nothing to Do With Women? (18 October 2016)

The lonely single men of MGTOW (25 June 2016)

Why can’t women find a good man? (21 June 2016)

Women ‘freeze their eggs because they are waiting for Mr Right – rather than putting their career first’. Today’s generation have high standards and want Mr Right over Mr Will Do (17 June 2016) UK, with related Reddit discussion thread here

No, I’m not afraid to be single in my 40s (4 June 2016) I wonder if the author and female readers would view a man writing an article (in which he expressed similar thoughts) in the same light? If yes, then great. I somehow suspect however that there would be comments along the lines of the man being selfish, a man-boy, unable to shoulder responsibility, etc

Millennials’ latest mistake: embracing the ‘starter marriage’ (29 March 2016)

Marriage Is Declining Because Men Are Pigs (24 March 2016) As with the article below, this paper endeavours to falsely paint the marriage strike as indicative of a monumental failure by men.

Single By Choice: Why Fewer American Women Are Married Than Ever Before (4 March 2016) USA, with related Reddit discussion thread here. Female author attempts to present marriage strike trend as something that women want/brought about – men are air-brushed out of the picture entirely.

Young women increasingly anxious about their finances (7 March 2016) Australia. Two things here. Note increasing unhappiness of women despite feminist ‘advances’. Second I wonder how much of that stress is due to the realisation that they are increasingly unlikely to find a Mr. Right (or Mr. Anybody) who will step in and clear their debts and then keep them in the manner … So no Plan B after years of casual mooching of boyfriends & living day to day.

Real housewives of Gen Y: Rise of the millennial homemaker (6 March 2016) Australia. If true then I feel sorry that many will be unsuccessful in realising their choice, thanks in large part to their mothers’ complicity with the feminist movement. Related Reddit discussion thread here.

Women: Where are all the good men? (18 February 2016)

Marriage Debate by Peter Hitchens (10 February 2016) Video

College-Educated Women Can’t Find Good Men – What’s to blame? (3 February 2016)

Young Men Giving up on Marriage: ‘Women Aren’t Women Anymore’ (8 January 2016) USA

Blaming men for the rise of childless women is an insult to both genders (7 January 2016) UK

Marriage proposals are still a guy thing (5 January 2016)

The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women, by David M Buss (January 2016) USA. An article written by a male academic, but from a wholly gynocentric perspective.

Tamara Chabe: Female graduates lose out as feminists kill the dating scene (16 December 2015) Be sure to peruse the readers comments

Minnesota nears slipping below 50 percent married rate (3 December 2015) USA. Why do most of these articles only provide a part of the picture and studiously ignore the rest? For e.g. they all mention that the marriage rate is dipping due to women delaying marriage, but neglect to mention that one reason they do is because many men don’t want to marry them!

Obligational Why Men Don’t Want to Marry Article (23 November 2015)

The Sunday Times Magazine Provides Frank, Humanizing Look at the Men Going Their Own Way (18 November 2015)

Meet the men giving up on women (15 November 2015) UK. This article is behind a paywall but google searching might locate a freebie version

Belinda Brown: Men don’t need to marry to get sex (2 November 2015)

Why are men frightened of marriage? (26 October 2015)

Hooking Up When You’re an Anti-Rape Activist (23 October 2015) Mainly included here because of the reader’s comments. See also related reddit discussion thread here.

It’s Not Your Imagination, Single Women: There Literally Aren’t Enough Men Out There (26 September 2015) USA

These women can’t find enough marriageable men (24 September 2015) and related reddit discussion thread here

Burning Man: Attitudes toward marriage and children (21 September 2015) Interesting paper

“The Economics of Sex: Why are There No Good Men Left?” (9 September 2015)

Where have all the good men gone? (25 August 2015) and related reddit discussion thread

Observations on Relationships in a Grocery Store (22 August 2015)

Feminizing the decline (19 August 2015)

Supreme Court Says That Gays Can Get Married; Women Hardest Hit (27 June 2015)

MGTOWs are losers – really? (26 June 2015)

Men must stop playing by the rules, walk away, and claim their autonomy. The gender contract is null and void. If a new social contract is to be agreed, it must be agreed by free men (18 June 2015)

Men giving up on women (and women who hate them) (13 June 2015)

Fewer Young People Say I Do — to Any Relationship (8 June 2015)

The fascinating connection between how much married people make and how likely they are to cheat (4 June 2015)

Coontz, Cherlin and Putnam Get it Wrong on the Decline of Marriage (1 June 2015)

Rich educated women cannot find husbands and it’s all your fault, by Sargon of Akkad (10 May 2015) Video

Men are to blame for the high divorce rate among America’s poor (4 May 2015) and related reddit mensrights discussion thread

Why men won’t marry you (1 May 2015)

Kathy Gyngell: Sexodus anger needs to be channelled before it explodes (27 April 2015)

Don’t give up on marriage? Request denied (23 April 2015)

Men’s rights activist to Fox News: Men need to avoid marriage at all costs (22 April 2015)

Kathy Gyngell: Men should stand up to feminists, not turn their backs on womankind (21 April 2015)

‘Divorce Corp’ 2014 documentary

Why men refuse to marry: Women complain chaps today won’t settle down. Sorry, ladies, but it’s all your fault, argues a wickedly provocative new book… Denigration of Men (20 April 2015)

Yes, Matt Yglesias, The Marriage Decline Is A Problem (2 April 2015)

The other impact that feminism has had on young men and relationships (30 March 2015) Reddit mensrights discussion thread

Inequality and the marriage crisis (26 March 2015)

MGTOW: Know them by their words (25 March 2015) This article by Peter Wright looks at sub-groups within the MGTOW movement

Majority of UK women don’t bathe or take a shower daily (24 February 2015)

Bachelor Nation: 70% of Men Aged 20-34 Are Not Married (12 February 2015) Author pushes the standard line that men aren’t marrying because they are immature. More than 2,000 readers put her on the right track

This article was a collaboration between Janet Bloomfield (aka JudgyBitch) and her husband on the subject of the modern woman’s one-sided expectations of marriage: Mr Judgy Bitch speaks (30 July 2013)

Okay, MGTOW, I get it now. If this is the option, I’d pass too‘ by Janet Bloomfield (22 April 2014) with a related discussion at reddit/mensrights here and a follow-up post here

Who said love was dead? More than HALF of under-35s getting married consider getting a pre-nup before they tie the knot (14 March 2015)

Women selling/buying positive pregnancy tests (March 2015) Youtube video

Feminist explains why porn ban is necessary: “A recent German study found a clear negative correlation between consumption of Internet pornography and marriage rates among young men!!!” Article and related reddit mensrights discussion thread (2 February 2015)

MGTOW: An impersonal force of history (13 December 2014)

Celebrating divorce by denying its existence (6 December 2014)

Can Stay-At-Home Dads Satisfy A Woman’s Need To Marry Up? (16 November 2014)

Is Marriage going Extinct? (19 October 2014)

Man ordered to pay £28,500 to his ex-girlfriend after break-up in landmark court ruling for unmarried couples (17 October 2014)

I left the love of my life because I thought I could do better. Now I’m childless and alone at 42 (9 September 2014) 652 reader’s comments suggest that this article hit a chord with many readers.

‘Why isn’t Carl good enough?’ (28 April 2014)

Don’t date before divorce, judge tells women (22 September 2014)

Record Share of Americans Have Never Married (24 September 2014) Interesting reading from Wendy Wang and Kim Parker at Pew Research

Why more women choose not to marry (15 October 2014) More than 2,000 readers comments, with a related reddit mensrights discussion thread here

The new merry-go-round (4 October 2014)

Has the war against men already been won? (5 October 2014)

Census: Marriage rate at 93 year low – even including same sex couples (18 September 2014)

MGTOW, Women and Sex by John Hembling (17 September 2014)

Man who paid child support for 22 years can’t get a refund (19 August 2014)

Fewer men are working, and marriage is dying (3 October 2014)

Six reasons why men are avoiding marriage by Helen Smith Ph.D (3 July 2013) Youtube video

Mates? Most married men waved our best friends goodbye years ago (13 August 2014)

The Future of Women in a MGTOW Society (12 December 2013) USA

You asked for it ladies, by Hannah Wallen (25 July 2013)

Can most men really afford a girlfriend? (15 April 2013)

Why men are withdrawing from courtship, by Dalrock (15 November 2013) Recommended reading

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nica-noelle/are-women-sexually-oppressing-men_b_5582485.html

8 reasons straight men don’t want to get married (20 August 2013) So very few articles on this topic examine the issue honestly and/or from the average man’s perspective

The American dream is every man’s nightmare (24 June 2014)

Feminist gay-bashing (27 June 2013) Is feminist antipathy towards gay men part and parcel of feminist loathing of MGTOW’s?

Young men giving up on marriage: ‘Women aren’t women anymore’ (10 January 2013) Recommended reading

Of marriage and men: stereotypes that ignore half the story, by Bettina Arndt (14 October 2012)

The More Chores A Husband Does, The More Likely The Marriage Will End In Divorce (28 September 2012)

Men not marrying? How deep does “the problem” go? (15 March 2012) USA video

The long, strange quest to find a substance that kills sexual desire (2012)

Why are today’s young men scared of girls who want children? Reddit discussion and linked article

http://www.shrink4men.com/2013/10/31/in-his-own-words-fake-pregnancy-fake-miscarriage-pwned/

https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2014/01/13/winning-the-lottery/

http://www.canadiancock.org/2014/03/22/honey-i-love-you-lets-get-divorced/

http://miltrosenberg.com/show/men-on-strike/

A video called ‘Divorce Corp’ (2014)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BoXQf2f2Yxo (A video called ‘Six reasons why men are avoiding marriage’)

http://www.unc.edu/courses/2010fall/econ/586/001/Readings/Brinig.pdf (‘These Boots Are Made For Walking’: Why Most Divorce Filers Are Women” American Law And Economics Review 2.1 (2000): 126-169

Some more reading/viewing:

The Marriage Strike Reddit and The MGTOW Reddit (discussion fora)

Redonkulas.com on MGTOW (satirical video) (19 March 2015)

I Wasn’t Treating My Husband Fairly, And It Wasn’t Fair (28 December 2014)

According to Hedonic Theory men have a greater chance of returning to their “hapiness baseline” after a serious spinal injury than they will after marriage (29 October 2014) Reddit discussion thread and linked article

Does your partner have a back-up waiting to take your place? (12 October 2014)

Whatever happened to ‘happy wife, happy life’? (10 July 2014)

78 percent of never-married women are looking for a spouse with a job. Finding one might be tricky (24 September 2014)

In-depth: How We Waded Into The Sexual Harassment Quagmire — And How to Wade Out: One Man’s View (Part 1 of 3 Parts) (11 December 2011) A good big-picture perspective

Woman steals ex-boyfriends sperm, has twins, sues for child support (23 November 2011)

Dr. Helen Smith on where the good men are, and why they left (19 June 2013)

This article is about “Men going their own way”