On Australian men seeking foreign partners

Some time ago I bookmarked an article entitled ‘Why overseas women love Aussie men‘. I was intrigued how the writer (a guy, by the way), managed to package a subject that could easily rankle female readers into something quite palatable. The potentially prickly subject he tackled was the phenomenon of men seeking partners from outside Australia.

In fact the author not only made the topic appear benign, but even presented it in a way that might conceivably massage the egos of readers. Part of his strategy was to present the issue as being one of foreign women preferring Australian men, rather than the other way around. Although he did sneak in that cheeky little quip at the end “If only they were more appreciated at home“. “They” being Australian men.

Although the author focused on American women, in fact women from the USA barely make it into the top ten list with regards to those granted partner visas. As you can see from this source, women from various Asian countries (particularly China, the Philippines and Thailand) are far more popular choices. This data is five years old, but numbers have remained steady since then. That doesn’t mean that demand for foreign brides is static however, with further growth in numbers prevented by annual quotas on spouse visas issued by the Australian Government.

I imagine that the reason for the focus on North American women (in the article) was simply to run with the Hollywood/male movie star angle. Another reason though might have been the fact that many western women have a certain ‘thing’ about being second-bested by Asian women. This is usually kept well under wraps, denied even, only to emerge guns blazing under the right set of circumstances (as mentioned in this other blog post).

The writer coyly suggested that the observed attraction to foreign partners was simply due to the ‘grass being greener on the other side of the fence’. It’s an approach that won’t hurt any feelings, as there is no need to acknowledge or reflect upon possible shortcomings on the part of Australian women.

Ah, but can you imagine the furore if the author had taken an alternative approach and asked the question “why are so many Australian men rejecting Australian women as life partners?“. Not that pro-feminist news.com.au would have accepted such an article for publication. Oh the bitter recriminations and backlash about men only wanting ‘submissive slaves’. The shaming remarks like “men who are threatened by independent women!” and “men who couldn’t get a women in their own country!” The horror, the horror. To those reading this and nodding their head to such sentiments … well I can only assume that you have little knowledge of Asian culture or personal experience with mixed-race couples.

I wonder to what extent this trend of Australian men marrying women from non-western backgrounds is due to changes in the attitude and behaviour of Australian women brought about via the pervasive and overdone influence of feminism? Heck, this could be a good topic for a thesis – that is if you could find a university brave enough to sponsor it.

Many thoughtful men in western countries now believe that their choice is limited to a MGTOW lifestyle, celibacy, or life as a purse-pooch/walking ATM (i.e. resigning themselves to the increasingly anti-male strictures of the society in which they live). For these folks an epiphany sometimes occurs upon exposure to life and relationships within a culture where feminist ideology, as we now know it in the west, has yet to take root. I think this is fairly evident in some of the references linked to this post about cross-cultural marriages. That blog post also addresses the negative bias and stereotyping directed at men seeking foreign partners as reflected in articles such as this. As one reader aptly noted:

“This is Scott Morrison and the Coalition playing dog-whistle politics again. Let’s not focus upon the thousands upon thousands of successful cross-cultural marriages that enrich Australian society – that would be a good news story! – let’s focus on a trivially small number of cases (exactly 2 were cited by Morrison) where an ambitious sugar-daddy seeks his naive, young asian bride. This is just pandering to small-minded racists who operate on simplistic stereotypes. This only increases the stigma against intercultural couples.

I’m angry about this because I’ve experienced this first hand. As an Anglo-Australian who has married an Asian seven years younger than me, I’m aware of the stereotypes that are directed our way. Nevermind that we are happily married, never had an argument and share everything together. This is something my brother, who has a partner 11 years his junior doesn’t have to go through because she’s Anglo-Australian too (Nor did my parents who were also separated by 10 years age gap.) This is simply a double standard based on race that society, and especially Scott Morrison needs to build a bridge and get over.

I have many friends who are in happy, loving, cross-cultural relationships. Unlike other couples we have to go through the rigours of laying our personal lives bare to the Immigration Department – who I can assure you are very thorough. Then after that we have to go through this nonsense. Scott Morrison should stop playing politics with people’s relationships and Governments should butt out of marriage. It’s nothing to do with them.”

What a pity most western feminist-influenced women don’t do introspection. Introspection seems to have gone the way of empathy.

And as for listening to what men say … pfff! As high-profile feminist turned MRA, Warren Farrell, famously stated “In our society, the sound of men complaining is like nails on a chalkboard“.

See also:

For some social context surrounding the topic of this post perhaps take a look at http://www.breitbart.com/Breitbart-London/2014/12/09/The-Sexodus-Part-2-Dishonest-Feminist-Panics-Leave-Male-Sexuality-In-Crisis

Sorry, Aussie blokes. American men are better suitors (10 August 2016) Entitled Australian woman thinks Australian men need to ‘lift their game’ to be more worthy. Australian men say “bon voyage, princess”

Aussie woman goes on 130 first dates but zero second dates (11 May 2015)

Why I am for the Importation of Hot Foreign Women (17 February 2015)

Are Australian women really all that bad? (15 July 2011) with 451 readers comments