In May 2017 media attention was given to a practice labelled as ‘stealthing’, whereby men remove their condom during sex without their partners consent (example). Few articles even made passing reference to the fact that women perpetrate a similar act when they falsely claim to be using contraceptives in order to ‘trap’ a man in a relationship and/or secure an income stream via child support payments. This issue was addressed in this article, and then in a follow-up article by Martin Daubney. See also this Reddit discussion thread.
‘Spurgling’ or ‘Sperm-jacking’ are terms that have been used to describe the use of a man’s sperm to cause pregnancy, undertaken without his knowledge or approval. Paternity theft has been defined as something which occurs:
“when a mother names a man to be the biological father of a child, when she knows or suspects that he is not the biological father; Or, She intentionally does not state the name of the child’s biological father on the birth certificate in order to either to begrudge the father, or to claim benefit” (Source)
Up until now I included references to these issues in another post, one that deals with financial abuse. I have now created this new post to address these matters, as they represent more than simply the financial abuse of men. One such aspect is the likely adverse impact on small children born either by, or into, such arrangements. This post will also address the growing problem of women stealing infants to raise as their own children.
Some relevant sources:
Police search for baby missing from Ipswich hospital (13 June 2023)
‘I was a victim of stealthing and didn’t know I’d been raped’, by Ginger Gorman (20 May 2023) Another feminist account that conveniently neglects to mention to flip-side of this issue, where men are the victims.
Tinder date faked pregnancy for nine months after one-night stand (8 December 2022)
Father wants justice after discovering late son’s paternity (5 December 2022)
Lisa Wilkinson questions efficacy of new stealthing sex crime laws (4 November 2022) And not one mention of men as being potential victims and/or women as potential perpetrators.
Stealthing: German woman jailed for stealing partner’s sperm (6 May 2022)
Woman puts baby up for adoption after sperm donor lied about ethnicity and education (14 January 2022)
My partner secretly got pregnant because she felt me slipping away (2 November 2021)
Woman who faked pregnancy to ruin ex’s life released on bail | Stuff.co.nz (3 September 2021)
Man who found out daughter isn’t his own fights off child support claim (2 March 2021) UK
Sperm-donor pursued to pay child-support (15 February 2021) UK
Husband’s shock as baby’s birth reveals wife’s infidelity (15 December 2020) USA
Sperm Donors Need To Cross Their Ts And Dot Their Is, Or End Up Like This Guy (26 August 2020) USA
Husband wants divorce after wife ‘baby-trapped’ him (21 August 2020)
Surprise! I know she’s not my daughter (29 July 2020) Why would you do this to me? (She says)
Dads by deception (5 May 2020)
Man forced to pay child support despite finding out he’s not the father – Now he’s taking legal action (23 December 2019)
Motherhood by theft (11 August 2019) UK
When male rape victims are accountable for child support (21 February 2019)
Thousands of dads are left in shock as DIY paternity tests soar (15 January 2019) UK
His Ex Used His Sperm Without His Permission. Now He Owes Child Support (3 May 2018)
‘My wife didn’t tell me she was trying to get pregnant’ (22 July 2017)
Nearly half of men who take paternity test are not the real father (3 January 2017)
Should we be doing more to expose paternity fraud? (4 September 2015) UK
The craving for a baby that drives women to the ultimate deception (3 November 2011)
Baby stealing (10 June 1972)