Kenya – Prawn of the Patriarchy

In one of those rare idle moments I happened to google on ‘sex tourism eat pray love’. As you do. One of the first articles to come up was this one:

Rhonda and Ketut as the faces of female sex tourism, by Nigel Bowen (22 Jan 2013)

It’s been claimed that many women share recreational past-times with local men whilst enjoying their holidays. Just typical isn’t it? Those MRA scumbags rubbish anything and everything that women cherish.

Anyway you can relax, because it’s so, so different to that nasty sex-tourism thing that men do. I mean it’s not like the boys are prostitutes or anything, and it does seem fair that if they take time off work to show a lady around then she might buy him a meal or small gift. Or two.

Nevertheless, those readers with an interest in the grubby side of things, are advised that I deal with the topic of prostitution in another blog post.

So how have feminists explained these very special holiday experiences?

“When women pay men for sex, it doesn’t have the same social effect because there is no history of women enslaving men” (Source)

“Female sex tourism” oversimplifies the motives of these women and that “romance tourism” explains the complex nature of what these women are engaging themselves in while involved in romance tours. They also explain that the expression “female sex tourism”, “serves to perpetuate gender roles and reinforce power relations of female subordination, romance tourism in Jamaica provides an arena for change” (Source)

“Once, sometimes twice, a month I meet up with Justin, a 36-year-old divorcé. We go out for a meal and maybe to a club before spending the night in a hotel … But what differentiates our dates from the norm is that I pay for Justin’s company, including having sex with him” (Source)

Married Calais Jungle charity chief ‘who had a year-long affair with toyboy Tunisian she met in the camp’ steps down after she pepper sprayed a refugee and threatened to drag female volunteer ‘by the f*****g hair’ (17 May 2023) (More details here)

“When men pay for sex, they are being exploitative & using women as objects. When women pay for sex, they are seeking “respect” (really!) and “good sex” (because non-professionals don’t satisfy). Confused? Just remember, when a woman does it, it’s good!” (11 April 2023) Twitter discussion and linked media article

Female sex tourism. What does it mean and where does it happen? (11 February 2023)

Secret overseas Tinder trick for ‘15 men in 21 days’ (25 March 2022) Australia. Oops, the “secret” is out now, Jana. Can you imagine news.com.au running this article with reversed genders? Me neither.

Woman disowned after finding new toyboy – despite being dumped the last one (5 February 2021) You can expect to see many more stories like this one in coming months/years. (Indeed, only an hour later, this article emerged)

Sex worker clients are increasingly women – and they’re seeking more than pleasure (9 October 2019) Of course they are

‘They want to be stimulated throughout the body’: Bali Gigolos share their secrets (7 May 2017)

Racketeering Refugees: What the Million Marching Pussyhatters Really Want? (28 January 2017)

Female seks tourism (26 November 2016)

Confessions of an Australian male escort: ‘I don’t just get booked for sex’ (9 September 2016)

Lonely Women Paying For Men’s Company (12 August 2016) Video

‘European Sugar Mamas’ – Women sex tourists in Kenya (29 July 2016) Reddit discussion thread

The women who hire male escorts (1 February 2014)

Wealthy Older Women Are Hiring Men In Kenya To Romance Them (22 October 2014)

http://travel.ninemsn.com.au/holidaytype/weird/7942963/cougar-prowl-female-sex-tourism-hotspots

http://www.rachelrabbitwhite.com/women-who-buy-sex-the-secret-life-of-jane/

http://harlotsparlour.com/2010/08/23/women-do-buy-sex/

http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/why-do-women-pay-for-sex-20131209-2z11k.html

What exactly is prostitution? Most people focus on the version of prostitution that we typically see portrayed in the media. This features men going to brothels or picking up women standing by the road, and purchasing their time in exchange for engaging in various sexual activities.

Things get more complicated however. One factor to note is that the payment for services rendered sometimes occurs after the act … sometimes well after. That payment may not be in cash either, it might (for example) take the form of a gift or gifts. In such cases we begin to move into the realm of mistresses or ‘sugar babies‘ or ‘paid dating‘, for example.

This should not however be confused with the social practices engaged in by women.

From here on in we launch into even murkier waters. For example some people argue that spousal support payments as routinely ordered by divorce courts are, at least in some circumstances, a form of prostitution (delayed payment for services earlier rendered). Some feminists, like Jane Caro, have even suggested that marriage itself is a form of prostitution (see here and here). Others go further and say that any form of paid work is a form of prostitution, in that work involves someone selling the use of their body by the hour.

What is the feminist perspective on prostitution? Seriously? Well it depends on the particular feminist you are speaking to, but most see it as highly undesirable and indicative of patriarchal exploitation of women. In keeping with feminist discussion on many other issues, feminists routinely ignore those aspects of reality that don’t support their narrative. Thus they assiduously look the other way when it comes to male prostitutes, woman who pay for prostitutes, women who operate trafficking or prostitution businesses, and women (with other employment/income options) who freely choose to work as prostitutes.

Driven by their narrative, feminists in various countries have lobbied to have the act of selling sex decriminalised whilst making the act of buying sex a crime (example). And again, in this particular debate both feminists and media alike keep discussion focused on female prostitutes and male clients.

In a September 2014 discussion on an Australian TV program, Kay Hymowitz raised feminist hackles by questioning why prostitution warranted being a major feminist issue, at least in part because of the relatively small number of women who were prostitutes. One of the other panelists then stated that it warranted being a major issue because one in four men used prostitutes (cue applause). So it’s all about the ‘menz’, huh? Comments like this reinforce the view that a significant factor underlying female opposition to prostitution is the notion of devaluing women’s ‘sexual currency‘.

Please review the selected linked articles below for further information:

Polish influencer just sold her love as an NFT for $250K (nypost.com) (29 July 2021)

The Effect of Adult Entertainment Establishments on Sex Crime: Evidence from New York City (27 May 2020)

Sex worker clients are increasingly women – and they’re seeking more than pleasure (9 October 2019) Australia

Spanish court rules union of sex workers illegal (21 November 2018)

Australian sex workers have a message for women in relationships: ‘Understand your man’ (23 March 2017)

Legislation to clear prostitutes of criminal charges while shifting the blame to the nearest man (14 January 2017) USA. Reddit discussion thread with linked article

‘Why should I wait any longer?’: 20-year-old student auctions virginity online for $230,000 (28 September 2016)

Decriminalization of Sex Work Is Not Associated with More Men Paying for Sex: Results from the Second Australian Study of Health and Relationships (24 February 2016)

Eat, pay, love: A new app lets women charge for a night out (14 July 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here

Daddies, “Dates,” and the Girlfriend Experience: Welcome to the New Prostitution Economy (7 July 2016)

‘Do you think we’ll pay for bad things we’ve done?’ Revelations of Aussie sex tourists in Thailand (3 July 2016) Feminist blogger Jas ‘Rawlinson’ Swilks serves up clickbait journalism that vilifies (white) men whilst promoting a biased misrepresentation of the Thai sex trade. See related Reddit discussion thread here, and follow-up post from the Ms Swilks here.

It is both an affront and most ironic that the author implies that expat men committing suicide in Thailand are doing so out of feelings of guilt (supposedly due to exploiting bar girls). These suicides are a real issue, but I would wager that the cause is the legacy of a life-time of exposure to the toxic anti-male environment in their countries of origin, this leading to substance abuse and general feelings of failure and hopelessness.

In reality many western feminists could not give a damn about the welfare of Asian sex-workers. Their real agenda is male demonization esp. in relating to curtailing the expression of male sexuality. Some background on that aspect in this blog post.

The author of this article conveniently fails to mention that:

plenty of western women also travel to Asia for sex (both commercial and non-commercial)
many Thai prostitutes are male or transgender (and are apparently not worth ‘rescuing’?)
many if not most men who travel to Asia don’t have sex with prostitutes

It is absurd to suggest that “Australian men [are] among the largest contributors to sex tourism in southeast Asia”. The reality is that Caucasian clients are simply the icing on the cake of the Thai sex industry, and Australians only one of many groups represented amongst tourist/expat clients.

Many (or even most) of these so-called sex-worker “rescue” organisations are either woefully ineffective in terms of getting girls out of the industry permanently – or they are out-and-out scams (example).

The dangers of rebranding prostitution as ‘sex work’ (7 June 2016) By feminist activist Kat Banyard

Sex trade surivors deserve a chance to speak (8 April 2016) Australia. Imagine feminists decrying those villains who would deny others a platform to speak. Oh the irony!

Why France Is Adopting A New Law That Criminalizes The Clients, Not Prostitutes (8 April 2016) with related Reddit discussion thread here

Prostitution row: A ‘male sex deficit’ – what about us horny women? (6 August) and related reddit discussion thread

Amnesty International says prostitution is a human right – but it’s wrong (29 July 2015) and related reddit discussion thread

Over half of UK prostitutes find their work rewarding (5 March 2015) Short video

Tag The Sponsor Exposes The Depravity Of Modern Women (2 March 2015)

A letter to my MP about laws on prostitution (12 November 2014)

Push to ban Swedes buying sex abroad (7 October 2014)

Who runs the girls? (20 September 2014)

Canada is following the wrong lead on prostitution (12 August 2014)

The truth about radical feminism (15 July 2014)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2fCPvuoHx0

All about the men (9 May 2014)